My daughter...my inspiration.

After being tortured for 9 months with vomiting,low blood pressure and then put on a walking frame as i was unable to weight bear due to a fractured pubic bone,and coccyx bone,i was induced at 37 weeks and went through 14 hrs of precipricated labour and then had my waters broken..in that process they pulled the doctor pulled out a red hair. I was mortifed as i knew of no redheads in our family and i said to my husband :"i didnt cheat on you i promise!" My husband and my mum burst into laughter and said..um my brother was a red head, and your babies grandmother was a redhead!" I didnt know that ...

An hour and a half after that i was on all fours on the floor saying i couldnt do this any more to my husband who was stroking my face,lying on the floor beside me..then i felt her head leave my body..i called out mum take a picture and then proceeded to push her all the way out.

She cried and as i pulled off my shirt as i was so hot and exhausted and rolled over onto my back and was propped up and handed a bright pink ,with bright red pouted lips and beautiful red hair..it was love at first sight.

we named her Jasmine Hazel ( after her great grandmother).

She was such a good baby and so easy..slept ate slept ate..it hasnt really changed!

When she was 6 weeks old, i was still on the walking frame and had thrush and mastitis in my breasts. i couldnt wear any clothes and every single time she sucked it was like a hot needle going into my nipples and i had to put cream on them and in her mouth as she got the thrush too.

I felt like a bad mother and she was having to be topped up every now and then with a bottle to gain weight. Then my mother in law said "well your husband wasnt breast fed and he turned out great..he never gets sick and hes really smart." It was then that i decided for her on good and my sanity to try the bottle..She thrived.

Jasmine as a toddler was inquisitive,funny, cheeky and loved her big brother brad and also loved boxes.She was always sitting in them with her toys or getting brad to close the lid and play peek a boo.

At school she was off with the fairies and getting distracted by her best friend daniel and loved playing with her friend penny who she had known since they were babies.

She is now in high school in year 11 doing subjects that she loves and doing really well in them.She got the best report shes had in secondary school and is showing more maturity than ever before..

But on the other hand she is still crazy funny.She loves pulling faces for photos,is always giggling with her friends ,loves anime,and dungeouns and dragons and is still thick as thieves with her brother.

But was inspires me about her is her tenacity and dedication to her passion...art. She always has a sketchbook with her wherever she goes and is so good at it..having won community awards and design awards throughout her school life.

She also doesnt give a shit about what people think of her..which is rare these days.She doesnt conform to societys expectations of what a teenage girl should be.

And she asks me for advice still..which i love and that inspires me to be an even greater role model in her life.

I just took her on her first paid photography job ( i have had a few on my own but due to my fibromylagia and other health conditions my mobility is no good and i need help)..

She did an amazing job and is definitely a chip off the old block.,and she loved it.

In relation to my illnesses,she has had to grow up quickly in a lot of respects and has to do a lot around the house and cooking..which she does with no fuss most of the time..i felt like a burden for a long time but now i know that it has made her a more compassionate,helpful,loyal and kind young woman.

My concern is for the world as it is today and how it will affect her in the future.That is where i hope i am her inspiration as i am trying to instill in her how to live a more sustainable life and just to follow her dreams and be the best person she can be.

Jasmine..You have grown into a stunning young woman.

thankyou for just being you..You inspire me every day and i am so proud to be your mum.xxxxx