Love is a Diet Coke

When I was standing there, at the alter, in front of family and friends, I vowed I would love him until death, obey him, and forsake all others. 25 years later and counting, I have realized sometimes love is a diet coke. What I mean by that is, Sometimes love is supporting your loved one enough to ask the waitress if you can change the writing on the menu because a word is misspelled and is driving his wife crazy. Sometimes love is not going back to a specific place because they do not have sugar free pie for him. Sometimes love is helping take the trash out because he is not feeling well. When he has stood in the kitchen cooking your favorite dinner, with all of the spices and foods that you love. As he smiles at you while the flavors he has so lovingly prepared dance around your mouth. Love is compromise. Some say love is work. I have not experienced work in my marriage. I have experienced transition, but not work. Gone are the days of puppy love. Gone are the days of believing the stars fell from the sky and landed in my eye. (Yes he said that). Does he love me after 25 years. I believe more so. I am his friend. He is my support. I am his organizer and helpmate. He is my strength and he is a smile and a wink no matter how he is feeling and they are just for me. He is also my sounding board and my voice of reason, most days. My husband used to buy me flowers all the time. When we were first married, I would receive roses just because it was a Tuesday. He started bringing me candy bars instead about 9 years ago. I asked him why he bought me candy bars. You see he always took his time picking the right candy for me. If he thought I may like a nutty flavor, he bought that. So I asked him, why I had not received flowers in so long? "Candy lasts and you love it." Flowers just die. I want you to have something you will enjoy, I try to choose something I think you will like." I was excited to receive my candy before he said that. Afterwards, I was very happy and appreciative of each candy bar.

Love is compromise. Celebrating 25 years of marriage with him I asked myself ," what is it that I could give my husband of 25 years?" What is it that he needs or wants and would not get for himself. He hates surprises. I went to the store and they did not have his brand of soda. So I went to another to purchase some for him, frustration set quickly when I noticed they had only one bottle. Going to yet another store in my small town searching for the allusive unicorn the diet coke had come to be, I finally found it. I could not let it get away, I had tracked it through jungle after jungle. So I drew back my bow and let my arrow fly. Then of course I loaded into my cart. With the feeling of satisfaction for wrangling the dirty beast, it occurred to me then. The gift I wanted to give him was this story. For medical reasons we drink diet soda in our home. I do not have a medical issue that requires the need for diet soda. We still do not have regular soda in our home. I can drink any soda or beverage I want. I choose not to. I choose to drink diet soda's because sometimes love is compromise and sometimes love is a Diet Coke.

Happy anniversary love, here's to 25 more (If we are not dead, that is).

Diane Johnston