Life's VIPs

Have you had a special bond with someone in your life? Have you had a special bond with someone who is no longer alive? Have you had a special bond with someone who is no longer alive and that someone was a grandparent?

I think you would agree with me, that the bond a human shares with their grandparents is a very special one. From a very young age, I had always been really close with my grandparents, especially my maternal ones as they are the ones who practically raised us while my parents were being normal parents working really hard to provide for their kids.

My grandad was the one driving myself, my brother and my two cousins to and from school every day when we were in primary school. During the early years, two of us were finishing earlier than the other two so he would in fact make the journey four times a day. When he would go back for the second time, I would normally join him and that was our own little ritual every day. When it was time to go he would shout for me from downstairs, "Hurry up, we need to go!" and that was my cue to just run outside and jump into the car. When everybody was home it was time for lunch. Grandma would have already prepared a delicious meal ready for us to enjoy and I would be the only one helping her to set and clear the table.

I have so many nice memories of them, like when I joined them on a holiday to Crete when I was 10 years old. My nan had always been scared of flying. On the flight, all three of us were sitting together and I had the window seat. While taking off, I was holding my nan's hand. I told here "don't worry nan, I got you!" After take off, I noticed we were sitting by the wing of the plane and that is when the teenage rascal inside me woke up and I go to my nan, "grandma, do you see that? We are sitting by the wing of the plane. If anything happens and we need to leave the plane we will be the first ones to jump out!" To which my terrified nan responded "grandchild why are you telling me this now, do you want me to have a heart attack? Please don't say these things!"

But as people grow older and become more fragile, the inevitable will happen. I lost my grandad when I was 22 years old. At some point serious illness stroke and he started to deteriorate. He went into the hospital and a few weeks later my mum phoned me and broke the news that he had passed away. A person that had played such a pivotal role in my life was no longer part of it.

Almost five years later it was sadly time to say goodbye to another important and most loved person. Nanna M was getting quite ill and was in and out of hospital a lot. At the time I was already living in London and I would occasionally see here over Skype and was joking with her about how beautiful she looked with her now all greyed out hair. The bond I had with her was pretty unique. I was named after her and everybody in the family would tease her that I was her favourite grandchild. Whenever someone would say this, she would get defensive because she didn't want us to believe that she had any favourites and say "I love all my grandkids equally the same." But between you and I...it was actually true!

In January 2o15, I booked a three day trip back home to surprise my mum for her 60th birthday. When I opened the door and they saw me they were both in shock. My mum asked me "what are you doing here?!", to which I responded, "I am here for your birthday". She goes to me "I think you are here to see your nan", to which my nan responded almost in tears "of course he is here to see his nan."

On Sunday she became unwell again and had to go to the hospital. My mum was by her side and had to spend her birthday in the hospital. On Monday I was leaving, and before going to the airport I stopped by the hospital to say goodbye. Just before departing, my mum looked at me and said "this is probably the last time you see her." Although I refused to accept that I kind of knew that it was true. A month later, nanna M passed away beaten by the Great C. The next day I flew home for the funeral and it was finally sinking in that this amazing person, the one that I had always called my second mother, was no longer with me. I would never hear her voice again, I would never listen to her advice again, I would never see her getting welled up every time I would come and go because she was always worried if I was ok living in a foreign country.

But you know what they say, "don't be sad that it has ended, be happy that it has happened." Therefore, although I was sad and devastated to lose these two amazing people, I am glad and honoured to be able to call them my grandparents and they will always have a special place in my heart.