King of Poachers

It was about 1 week before my 10th birthday in the late month of January of 1977. My father comes up to me and ask me what I would like for my 10th birthday. He even went so far and point out the mathematics of how important a child 10th birthday is. In case you have forgotten this is the start of the 90 year cycle of double digits. It will take 9 decades to get to the BIG THREE’S” 100 year old birthday which is to say your 10 all over again but with an extra ZERO!

So I looked the man in the eyes after he had his moment of mathematics history of aging laid out before my obviously I do not really care adolescence feet. and I answered him. “Mongoose” plain and simple. My mother and I still had our secret pack to get rid of the ‘Henrietta aka the pet rattlesnake’ so there I am being a little smart-ass, why not it was plain and simple.

Then it hit like a tsunami a wave of stunned emotions. The look on his face was priceless but most importantly it was the look of a man who had no idea what I was talking about. need I remind it is 1977 and most people did not know what a mongoose was. sure there was a book and a cartoon by the same name. Ricki Ticki Tavi yes the other Rudard Kipling, who based it off of some ancient Indian stories.

So there I was stunned as his look was all to familiar the look of a father who had no idea what his son was saying to him. A parents worst night mare come true what is he babbling about was the look. OH CRAP it what it is called to a kid. Finally he worked up the courage and he just ask. What is a mongoose he asked. Then it hit again, OH CRAP part two! Just how do I tell him without spilling the beans. How do I speak the words of not killing a beloved family Pet!. sorry I always chock on this last part excuse me while I go out side to relive myself of the hysteria that takes over.

So I am fine now as I write but here goes.; How to explain to the O man what not is a mongoose buy how important it is for a boy my age to have a mongoose. right... ya good luck buddy. so I stated it was like a monkey. OK OK just bare with me OK. i am after all just still 9 not quite the 10 year old genius I was destine to become. Stop laughing so back to a monkey, cat, yes I know I maybe stretching it a little huh. oh wait RAT. OK he was bemused and the I really cannot understand me at all was on his face at all as I am really starting to babel about how I will name It Ricki Ticki Tavi. I am practically giggling and yes I am certain I was babbling in the 9 year old speech.

Rick huh. first your name your Dog Chuck not Rick. I stop and look him in the eye. “Charlie” I had named my dog Charlie the same dog I rescued out of the city land fill as a puppy. Yes the dog was a boys best friend as he follow me all over town collecting empty bottle and cans for cash return. He and I where a pair of jokers, but any way he look at me and let me got his his serious straight straight look on his face. part monkey part cat pat and a Rat? then out of nowhere comes mom.

Enter sound effects and the scent of fresh baked cookies and the soft light. ya that mom. It is a Rodent from the sub Continent of India. it is the latest thing for little boys to have as a pet. ITS A FAD DEAR! she also said under neath all that honey and sugar that a mom pours on a dads soul.

Yup it was a conspiracy coming to full fruit. so now I was in full cahoots with mom and we where on the thresh hold of a full blown GET RID OF THE HENRIETTA MOMENT.

And she just tries to explain it is a bushy tailed rodent, “Oh you meant a Ferret he say. you want a ferret? why didn’t you say so”. No no no we said mom and I said together, not close at all. I told him you can get them at the local pet store but you have to order them and they send for one form out of California. Honestly I was really stunned how mom had the mom sugar overload on the family effect going. you know that bubble she puts out and how she mumble a secret spell from under her breath and POOF! every thing is peachy and full of rose’s. She was really putting the magic in to the air right then and there.

“You can stop off on your way home from work and talk to the pet shop owner you know.” she says right then and there. “POOF!”

“Pet store huh. guess I will have to stop off after work and get one” and so every day after work I would run home and yes I bragged all day every day at school. I would be the first kid in school to have a pet Mongoose after the kid who dad had a pet rattlesnake title. which I was willing to forfeit at any given moment. So I would run home every day that week, and yes it was a really fast and out of breath running. 2 miles all down him mind you record breaking. I would get home and wait for him at the door. For the next 4 days. My little brothers and sister had not idea of what I was getting at but they knew better. They had that what are you up to but I know to stay out of it or get run over by the big brother express train. if twas on the fourth day that he comes homo an as usual we (mom and I) where waiting for the mongoose ‘Ricki’, would be joining the family.

I go to ask him and it hits. KABOOM!! He just exploded and just went on and on blah blah blah about how we where in a conspiracy against him. Him of all people blah blah blah again how he was the family provider about how a mongoose would kill his pour baby. now let me re explain something about Dad and Henrietta. He hoarded her like Gollum did the ring. MY precious my precious. ya that was how it was with him and that damn snake. We where the bad guys mom and I!.

So finally he looks me in the eye and points those two same finger and say’s “your really starting to remind me of your mother”, and then he looks at her and says. “you really need to stop encouraging him! and off he walked mumbling.

mom looks at me and say's "Guess we should have taken the Ferret..."