I Don't Believe What You Believe

The cool thing is that we should believe different things because we are different people. My world view has been impacted by genetics, nurturing, indoctrination, and inundation. What I believe is the product of my surroundings and the messages I have heard. Even when we see the world from the same perspective, the sum of our experiences changes what we see, how we view it, why it is meaningful, and who is impacted. Over the decades, I have observed members of the same families, same traditions, or same faith groups who imagine that they hold the same beliefs. Still, when questioned, they demonstrate that the truth is more relative than absolute. Our access to information and facts and opinions are at once extraordinarily open and inordinately selective. Bias may be the primary principle in belief.

In a polarized pandemic world, we may be overwhelmed and incapable of sifting and validating information, and we rely on short cuts to confirm our suspicions. I begin from a position of curiosity and seem to synthesize disparate information data points even when they don't easily mesh. I explore the known and unfamiliar and try to imagine how things work and how they could be different. My brain is comfortable in the uncertainty and thrives in Why. I become agitated with routine, and 'tried and true' doesn't resonate with me.

I have three sons raised in the same household by the same parents at roughly the same time. One of my sons tends towards rational thought and models that are prescribed. He believes in 'reality' and feels unease and discomfort when uncertainty reigns. I get anxious and even angry if the discussion is about rules, regulations, and statistics, as concrete thinking isn't a strong suit. He can remember formulas, codes, and strings of numbers. He also holds family memories very close to his heart. We see the world from a different perspective.

Another son loves to understand how of the world. Not only 'how stuff works' but also the plans and time it takes to accomplish tasks. He relishes factoids and what others see as trivial information. Careful consideration and ensuring that everything that is required is packed. He arrives at his destination after thorough deliberations. His patience is frustrating for a destination-focused person like me, I can see this as painfully nitpicky, and he would say that I jump without checking to see if it is a parachute in the bag.

My third son builds his world through his relationships and the relationship that one idea has with another. He has strong attention to the details and can be the most emotional of the three. My emotional moments are sentimental, and I can be angry when people don't own their stuff and teary when they atone for their behavior. He can break down anything, including ideas, and put them back together as they were. I am more likely to see if the puzzle fits a different way and be interested in what happens if I leave a piece out.

Even when we see the world from the same perspective, the sum of our experiences changes what we see, how we view it, why it is meaningful, and who is impacted. We love and respect each other and have begun to understand that we can be right and wrong at the same time, depending on where we stand as we are looking.

This began as a concise thesis on the reactions that I witnessed, from the broader world, in early 2021 and has evolved into a wandering quest to understand the different views of the people closest to me.

B