10+1 tips for raising bilingual kids

Born and raised in Athens, currently living in Montreal and raising two children between French, Greek and English, I am experienced, but not an expert in raising multilingual children.

When our family started our multilingual journey, we were not sure how it would evolve. Now that both kids, aged 7 and 4, are comfortable in all three languages, I can say that it has been a successful experiment- so far. Talking to other parents, I have realized that many have the intention of raising their children in two languages, the majority language of their place of residence, and their heritage language. But they see it as a colossal task.

I decided to share with you a few practical tips for raising bilingual children and encourage you to embark on this journey with a positive attitude and a few more tools in your box.

1. Plan ahead. We decided on our language plan before our son was born. Our circumstances were a given: we live in Montreal, our kids would go to French school, a large part of our family is English speaking and we are both Greek. Coming up with a concrete language plan gave us more time to prepare, discuss it, do research and feel more confident about our choice.

2. Plan REALLY ahead. Planning ahead does not stop in the first months or year of your child's development. Think about things like the school system where you live. Which language will need more support in the upcoming years? Could that affect your choice of baby sitters or extracurricular activities? For example, in our case, we know that both kids will need additional support if they to read and write in Greek. We do not have to address this yet, but we already have thought of a couple of options.

3. Share your plan. People around you, family, friends, co-workers, will have all sorts of opinions when you decide to raise your children in multiple languages. Stories, theories and examples that it did or did not work. The most frequent comment is that bilingual kids take longer to speak. Research has shown that is not true. But the surprising thing is that the more open you are about your plan, the more people will respect your decision. They will learn to live with it, even end up admiring it.

4. Find expert support. The many books, websites and podcasts on multilingual families can be valuable companions. They will help you feel less lonely on your journey and maybe give you really valuable tips and simple ideas for all stages of your child's development. Take advantage of them as much as possible.

5. Use books. Books are an indispensable treasure when it comes to language development, whether you are raising your children bilingual or not. They provide vocabulary outside the mundane everyday words and can be great conversation starters with older children. Finding books in the minority language can be tricky and might take a little bit more effort and creativity. Guess what our suitcases are full of when we are travelling back from Greece!

6. Videos can be your ally. We try to control the amount of time your kids spend in front of a screen. Plus, I do not know if there is any evidence that videos actually benefit language development. But, if you combine screen time with the language you are trying to support, you have an additional ally in your corner. Start with short videos and watch them with your kids. You can ask a question and make sure that they are actually following the story rather than aimlessly looking at the moving images. It does not have to be educational videos per se. For me, the important thing is correct grammar and a rich, age-appropriate vocabulary.

7. Find a community- especially other kids. It must be strange for bilingual children to feel that the minority language is only spoken at home, by their crazy parents. A community of other people who speak the same language reinforces their motivation. Other kids that speak the same language can provide an even stronger and friendlier incentive to speak the second language. It does not have to be a big group of people. Just a few friends will help children put the second language in a broader social context.

8. Do not push, follow your kid's lead. Many kids will choose not to speak the second language, even though it is obvious that they understand everything. It might result in absurd conversations in different languages, but don't fight it. Lean in. Even if you do not see it and you feel that your efforts are in vain, your child's brain is working hard taking in the other language.

9. But point out successes. Praise your child's efforts and make them understand you appreciate their efforts... Whenever we visit our cousins in the US, I like to remind my son how great it is that he stuck with English, so that now he can play with his cousins. I overlook the part where the only English words that came out of his mouth until age three were bed and teeth!

10. Be consistent. It sounds simple, but it isn't. It takes a lot of effort and focus, especially at the beginning. But even if one day, or one week you were not consistent, don't beat yourself up and don't quit. Maybe that day or that week that you just could not put in the effort, you were tired, distracted. Let it be just a day or a week on a journey that will last years. And through being consistent day after day, you will discover that speaking more than one languages, will end up being a habit, a communication code and part of your everyday family jargon.

11. Do NOT give up. It will probably not look the way you imagined. It might not be a perfect ride the whole time. But your efforts are paying off, whether you are seeing it or not. This short list of tips is far from exhaustive, but if you need to come out with one main idea, this is it. Keep it up. Every person has a different way of learning a language and understanding the world. Maybe your kid will not be absolutely fluent in both languages. Maybe life will lead them to use one much more than the other. They might move across the ocean and raise their kids in another language. But keep reminding yourself that you are offering them a unique gift and you are planting a valuable seed for their future development.