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The Story Behind Ben Boa. Runner-Up in Not Quite There Yet Challenge.
At the start of this year, I told myself this is the year to make it happen. “Let’s make it a New Year’s resolution that you will do it,” I told myself and then did a reality check. "Let's not get too excited or go too far."
By Calvin London3 months ago in Critique
A- B Disconnect
The roads were busier than usual as the barriers kept rising. The metal vehicles buzzed all over as the barriers rose and fell. Built for collision, not comfort, the full-metal vehicles rattled along the roads to the city of Altronia. Elizabeth could feel her stomach shift as the vehicle sped past the barriers, and the traffic without humans was as bad as when they drove. The A-B competition was the one thing Elizabeth had selected for the event, hoping to make the A team, the best team, but playing for the B team if necessary. The yearly multi-sport event that teens would compete for dominance in physical sports. Elizabeth was running late. The event of the year was running on time. The ride there jolted as she grabbed the vomit bag in the back, emptying her stomach for the second time. The competition was only miles away, and yet the traffic was crazy between all the other cars. A stream of light flashed as the car came to a sudden stop. The wall stood up as Elizabeth flung forward. The wall lowered as the car sped to the event center. Looking at her watch, she saw the time had gone by quickly, and she was going to be late. This could cost her a chance to make the A team despite leaving so early. As the large building came into view, Elizabeth hoped she could finally check in. Another slam on the brakes left her holding on for her life.
By Sarah Danaher3 months ago in Critique
Wild Rose (MY ONLY 'FRIENDS' FROM THE PSYCH WARD "soap opera"). Winner in Not Quite There Yet Challenge.
Dostoyevsky wrote that Hell is the inability to love. Among other things, my experiences with psychiatry and drugs, etc. would come to prove to me that the inability to truly love is indeed, at the very least, a type of hell or purgatory. But where this hell originates from is a mystery bequeathed to psychologists and writers to ponder and analyze; although the quality of this analysis is proportional to the writer's own level of evolution and enlightenment.
By ANTICHRIST SUPERSTAR3 months ago in Critique
Rosamunde or "Write What You Know". Runner-Up in Not Quite There Yet Challenge.
Rosamunde was a boring girl. She was the kind of girl that people would look past when scanning through the crowd. The kind they would describe as a "nice girl" because they could find nothing specific to say.
By Sasha Desideri3 months ago in Critique
The Weight of Water
I was twelve the first time the ocean tried to take me. My stepdad and I were sailing our Hobie Cat through the Carquinez Strait on a warm May evening, the kind of evening that makes you trust things too easily. The wind filled our sails as we moved toward the Benicia Bridge, everything smooth enough that it felt like we knew what we were doing.
By Tina D. Lopez3 months ago in Critique
Masie Adams. Content Warning.
I never wanted to come back to Garden City. Everyone here hates me because I won't play by their stupid rules. As luck would have it, when I went to the Pig to pick up some essentials, I had the misfortune of picking the same shopping day as Betty Blanchard Johnson. You'd think being a Blanchard was an accomplishment, that it requires a special skill set to be a Blanchard even though there's more Blanchards in these parts than there are Pinckneys in Charleston.
By Harper Lewis 4 months ago in Critique
