The Only Time I Walked In on Sex

College can be strange sometimes.

It’s had its moments during my four years at the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign. I can tell many stories but the following one is the best.

I never grow tired of telling it.

I Planned for a Quiet Night

It happened sometime during the spring of freshmen year. For whatever reason, neither my roommate or I were going out on this Saturday night.

We hung out with our own friends and were in bed by 11. I was in that dazed phase where I’m up but still kind of asleep.

A little after midnight, I thought I was dreaming. But the noise wasn’t in my head. Some guys on the floor were screaming at each other.

All of the sudden, glass shatters. It was the kind of shatter after James Bond busts through a window.

One of the guys in the hall then screams: “Hey, you broke my f***ing bong!”

They quickly storm out of the hall and that was the end of that.

Only it’s not the end of the story.

Then Comes the Naked Guy

Within the same hour as the shattering glass, our room door opens. I guess we forgot to lock it.

I was still in that dazed phase and I thought I was dreaming again. It was real.

The figure stumbles into our room and jumps on top of me in bed. I sit up. “What the hell are you doing?”

He looks at me and said: “Get the f*** out of my bed!”

“This isn’t your bed bro. Get out”

My roommate turns on his bedside lamp and asked what was going on. We realize the kid, who’s only wearing boxers, was a guy we knew who lived down our hall.

He kept screaming. “Get out of my room! Both of you!”

My roommate and I quickly tried to corale this guy back to his room. We helped him out into the hall, and my roommate asked: “Where’d all of this glass come from?”

I laughed to myself. “Tell you later.”

We then continued to help the guy down the hall and made sure his bare feet didn’t step on the glass. After the glass, he bumped into the wall a few times.

He then proceeds to strip off his boxers and continues to bump into walls. My roommate grabbed his boxers and we opened his room door, made sure he got into his bed okay.

The guy had quit screaming at us after the bumps to the head. My roommmate threw his boxers in the room and then we both went back to bed for the night.

But the unexpected came next.

The Morning After

The next morning, I wanted to check on the kid and make sure he was okay. So I went down to his room and made a mistake.

I should’ve knocked. I really should’ve.

I hear: “Somebody’s coming!”

I walk in and he’s having sex with a girl on his bed. They both look at me, and he stands up butt naked and points to the door. “Get out of here man!”

I shut the door and almost sprint back to my room. What the hell just happened?

After a while, I told him what happened the night before, everything. He laughed about it and didn’t remember a thing.

I also apologized for walking in on his him that morning. He proceeds to tell me his girlfriend broke up with him that night so he got pissed and drunk.

He didn’t remember stripping to his boxers. He didn’t even know where those clothes were.

Nevertheless, he explains early that morning his girlfriend texted him and wanted to make up. That was their way of doing it.

We laughed about the whole night and I made some promises. I would that day forward always knock on his door. I would also lock our room door each night.

It’s one of my favorite college stories to tell.

Closing Thoughts

That whole experience was filled with laughs, confused moments and one great story to tell. I also learned some lessons too.

Anything can happen in college. I guess I should’ve expected it.

The guy and I were never close and we talk nowadays off and on. We still laugh about this story snd he gave me full permission to tell it whenever and as many times as I wanted to.

It’s just too good not to tell.