Tears, Ears

For as long as I can remember, it was just me and dad. Growing up, there were a few things I could always count on: Dad’s guidance, a best friend, and popcorn. I guess I’m one of the lucky ones; I know not everyone has a dad in their life, and many more have dads that are subpar. Though we didn’t always have a lot, I knew I could always count on mine, even if it meant watching Star Wars or Star Trek and eating popcorn for dinner. There could be worse things.

As the women and mother figures changed in my life, my dad stayed constant and true. He has always been my hero, and always will be. He is a great role model for my children, and always looks forward to spending time with us. Equally, my children and I are always excited to see him, even if the visit is short.

My dad joined the military, and I wanted to do it too, not only because he did, but because I wanted him to be proud of me. I remember joining the military, and earning my Airman’s coin at basic training graduation in San Antonio, Texas. My dad, of course, was there. But it wasn’t just at major events. He went to my middle school basketball games (though that was probably painful to watch) and helped me with science fairs and asked me when I started cussing (7th grade).

Then my dad earned his doctorate; the first in the family. He taught me to believe that kids should always strive to do and be better than their parents, and so I knew getting a doctorate would be my next goal. The military paid for most of my schooling, and there were several times I needed help with assignments or needed a proofreader. My dad was there. Now, I’m working on my doctorate, and I still hope I make my dad proud.

But it’s more than having someone to rely on. He taught me how to be a good friend to others, how to be a best friend, and how to choose a man for myself. And that wasn’t easy, let me tell you. There was even one point when a guy I was dating and my dad got into it, and I was already in trouble because I wasn’t supposed to be out. My date asked me to choose between him and my dad. As if it were ever a choice to consider. So I ditched the guy and moved forward with my dad. Stupid boy.

There was a time when I was upset and crying, and dad tried to cheer me up. I was laying down, so my tears were falling into my ears. "Tears, ears," became another thing between us, in addition to the I love you most contests and consistent popcorn dinners.

My dad taught me how to work hard, persevere, and achieve my goals. He taught me that it’s okay to ask for help. I needed that back in 2017, when I was hospitalized for a month. I was engaged at the time, and the man I was to marry didn’t even flinch. My son was taken care of by my dad, while my then fiancé took over the wedding planning. We married the following January, and I knew I had made the right choice of husband. I could go on about how my husband is my new best friend, but that is for another story.

I look to my daughter and hope that she can depend on her dad as much as I depend on mine. Both of my kiddos love my dad, and it’s easy to see why. He’s smart, funny, of course corny, and loving. He always makes time for others, even at the expense of his own projects. I have to say that I do that too, and hope that my kids depend on me as much as I do on my dad.

To this day, I still talk to my dad on almost a daily basis. I fear the day he will no longer be around, because I’ll not only be losing a dad, but also my best friend and confidant. I’m hoping that is still a good 30-40 years off, at least. I love you, daddy, and I’ll always be your Kelly Puppy. Tears, ears.