Surprise Party

The day had finally come! I was fifty. My husband was throwing a “surprise” party for me. It would be a surprise alright. I dressed carefully and did my make up just the way he liked it. I was still a trophy wife at fifty and he loved to show me off. I had to look perfect. I practiced my surprised face and fake smile in the mirror. It was almost time to go out with my best friend, Chloe. Chloe and I had gone to school together since we were 14, we got married at the same time, had kids the same ages and lived in the same neighborhood. We were inseparable as were our husbands and kids. She was taking me for a drink – to get me out of the house before the party. Then we were going to come back and get ready for the vacation I was leaving on tomorrow. A yoga retreat all by myself. Yep, this is fifty. The kids were young adults and John, my husband never took vacations, so off to the fat farm by myself.

Drinks with Chloe were slow and awkward, trying to pretend I did not know what was going on. I tried to keep the mood light and fun, but I knew I was falling short. “Let’s dance!” I loved to dance, so after a few drinks it was no surprise to her that I jumped up and started shaking my ass to my favorite song. We danced a few songs, and I was just wishing that this were how I was spending my 50th birthday, in a bar with a band, dancing my ass off. “We should get going, Sarah. We have dinner with the guys and then we have to get you packed!” I rolled my eyes and finished the song, slammed back my drink, and nodded.

I was quite proud of my acting skills as I walked through the door and feigned surprise. I looked around and tried not to grimace. It was so tacky! So over the top. This party had nothing to do with me. Roses? I hate roses! A classical band? Try shaking your ass to that!! I mingled and kissed John and oohhed and ahhed over the party. How did he know I deeply desired one more pair of diamond earrings that I couldn’t wear? How thoughtful he was.

He looked smug as he traipsed me in front of his friends, HIS friends, and sat me down at our table. Dinner was served. Shrimp Scampi. I have always been allergic to seafood! What the fuck was going on? “I can’t eat this, John!! You know that. Why would you do this?” I was trying to keep a smile on my face and my voice low. “Oh no!! I did not know what scampi was! I will get you something else. I am so sorry.” He ran towards the kitchen. I wasn’t sure I believed him after the rest of his choices for the evening, but this could have killed me.

The kitchen had prepared beef on a bun for a midnight snack so that is what I ended up with for dinner. I closed my eyes and pictured myself dancing in the bar. I pictured myself far away from this party, this sandwich, and this man who after 25 years knew absolutely nothing about me. I was surprised he even knew it was my birthday. I was off in my head when John nudged me. Everyone was singing to me as a giant vanilla cake made its way towards me. Vanilla! Who the hell likes vanilla? “I like chocolate! I like chocolate!” I screamed in my head as a smiled and blew out the candles.

“Wait until you see what I did for you!” He spun me around towards the front of the room. A slide show. The lights dimmed and the band started playing softly in the background. Naked pictured of John and Chloe lit up the big screen, pictures of them in my bed, on my couch, in my car. I heard John swear and run towards the projector. I made sure he couldn’t stop the humiliation. Sexting pictures, videos, you name it I had it. Pictures of their texts back and forth of how much they loved each other. And the absolute best part? The recording of my best friend telling my husband to leave me, that I was fat, and lazy and crazy and that I did not deserve him. She was right. I did not deserve either of them.

Steve, Chloes husband walked up beside me looped his arm in mine and we walked past all the gasps and outrage and out of their lives for good. We were done being cheated on, lied to, manipulated and disrespected. We drove to a diner, and I got my chocolate cake and a brand-new life.