How Whitney Hedrick’s High Maintenance Woman Series Became The Best Start To 2022 For Me

I started 2022 with two goals - To prioritize health, grow in my career and excel in my writing.

I love self-improvement videos and I will never get bored of self-care routines or wake up at 5 am routines. I rarely implemented any of them.

Then came the recommendation that sounded both clickbaity and promising at the same time - Stop Being Desperate And Start Being Irresistible. Alright, yet another self-improvement video and my first impressions were that of “how to do your makeup well”, ”how to look classy” advice.

But how wrong was I!

I was taken aback by how relatable her contents were.

I had a lesson to take away after each video and I kept coming back to them. I swear that next to educational videos I had never watched any on repeat

Whitney changed it all for me.

In just one week, I found myself changing a few aspects of my life.

I started maintaining a cleaner house, I chose cute denim shorts and a nice blue blouse in place of my sweatpants for Monday at home. I fished out my Ruby Woo, added a stroke of eyeliner and dabbed a bit of illuminating moisturiser. These are my usual steps when I step out but never at home.

I was happy to see the person smiling back at me in the mirror. She looked pretty and glowy!

I felt Whitney speaks to us because a lot of things are based on going back to ourselves. We do it by upholding our standards, using our energy for good things and letting go of chasing people.

She called high-maintenance the same as self-care and thanks to her, for the first time I started having a consistent self-care routine.

Here are the changes I made in three weeks from the learnings from her:

Striving to be the good girl was not helping me

Growing up in a conflicted environment and being the first born, I had convinced myself that nothing can be solved by a fight. I did everything possible to avoid having confrontation with someone. I felt there is always two sides to a coin.

I had to give up my standards if I am ever going to have people in my life. I was scared to lose people and ended up becoming a pushover.

For years, these behaviours caused me damage.

I was dumbstruck when Whitney mentioned in her video on “ how to be a low-maintenance woman” that “Everything is negotiable” is a defining trait of a woman who has low standards for herself.

Wow, that had been my life motto!

That was such a moment of enlightenment.

I started revisiting my past hurtings, especially in my relationships. My first assault in trying to win people was my self-respect. That awareness was quite liberating!

I don't have to be the bad bitch, the outspoken woman I admire but I can convey, in my trembling voice about what is right and not and that would be a win!

Don't Chase Relationships

Okay, this was not the first time I heard anyone say - “Dont chase men, if someone is interested you will know”. The difference was of course how Whitney conveyed the message.

A loving relationships has eluded me till today. I have a beautiful family and amazing friends but what about romantic love?

I was of the notion that the guy would understand my feelings only if I exactly spelled out to him what I was looking for and show him I was interested. I had hurtful events the past year with someone who was too busy to respond to most of my texts and also admitted about not looking for something serious. Yet, I tried to interpret the message as maybe not now but later.

In short, I was sabotaging myself and wasting time!

My learning was this - To the ones that really matter all these hard work is not necessary. There is no games and definitely there is no drama.

Whitney conveyed her message strong here - Have your standards high and let people meet you there.

I used to be this person and what happened to her now?

Thank you Whitney for showing the right thing which I needed so badly.

Tough love was what I was looking for.

A glamourous life means having a clean living space first

I have no shame to admit that I have inconsistent cleaning habits. Sometimes, my house looks sparkling with sunshine washing away my windows and a pristine kitchen and other days it's a house battered by storm.

Whitney called out this “all or nothing” attitude which also resonated with the lessons I learnt from Atomic Habits. Its the small habits that make all the difference.

I started with cleaning up my floor then and there after cutting veggies and cleaning my kitchen slab the moment I finished cooking and doing the dishes after every meal.

The difference was magic!

I Don't Have to Wait Even For A second To Celebrate Me

I knew I can't love anyone until I loved myself.

Yes, I have been told that a hundred times but can someone just tell me how I can do it after year's of hating me?

This was exactly the questions that crossed my mind after year's of listening to advice. Whitney's videos helped me a lot here.

Learning to embrace my beauty and body was a lesson I learnt recently - Just my own features without comparing with a supermodel or the college girl neighbour.

I love applying diy face and hair masks but somehow stopped doing them. I am a huge fan of green juices and a beetroot smoothie by afternoon for glowing skin (it works!).

I understood I don't have to wait for special occasions to pamper me, I need to just start with mini-steps.

When I started making effort in self-grooming and creating a beautiful living space helped me look at life from a different perspective.

Yes, I feel different.

I see myself uttering that I deserve care and luxury as I apply my banana hair mask, I feel cared, when I sleepily cut gooseberries and make my gooseberries-alovera juice.

I can feel the love only when I keep doing loving things to me and keep showing up for it - everyday!

Final Thoughts

Sometimes having a good life starts with getting the basics.

These could be something like setting our standards and holding on to them, finding a place of peace and stop chasing people and creating a beautiful outer space and cherishing my body and inner space. That makes my world beautiful!

Thank you Whitney Hedricks for helping people like me embark on this journey. For some it might be life advice but for me this is true lessons in spirituality!