Funny Things

Funny things about life

I find it interesting how things for a moment are answers to hopes dreams and burning questions we have in our lives. Like that one thing, you've been praying for or thinking of that you wonder if it's meant to be. And yet it seems so far in the Horizon that you can't quite grasp it yet. Alas, such was my life before I moved to Florida. I had been pondering for months on my purpose and why I have such relationships in my life.

The answer to both was in one simple sentence I read in a book. It said," You are probably meant to be in someone's life as a test to see if they would improve themselves or not". What struck me most about it was I was simply venting to a dear friend about my life. Specifically about some people in it. It never occurred to me before that time it was a test or I mean. That I was a test for other people. It's an intricate concept if you think about it.

Yet looking back on my life it makes the most sense. Especially those that get the closest to me even family. And this friend did not know why I needed that answer at the time she gave it to me. Yet another example. Of course, I should probably preface this with a few helpful stories about my past specifically relationships-wise. So my life was the rock bottom of the world. At least it felt like that sometimes.

What's sad is my relationship history is the basement of the basement type thing. I mean I didn't get a date until I was 20. The main reason for that I think had to do with the fact that I was LDS and my family used rumors and manipulation to ensure that I wasn't or I mean I didn't have any guy relationships until I was that time.

My family has always been super manipulative and I think now sometimes jealous of me. And the only time I dated was because I had to ask the guy to go on a date with me. It's in very little for myself esteem at the time, to say the least. It was difficult to go solo on Many Adventures but I learned how to be independent. Which backfired on them thank god.

Not that I'm not drop-dead gorgeous yet I wasn't the ugliest one in my family. I was happily in between or so I thought. It made me mad at the world especially when all of my friends in high school around me were getting we're dating or getting engaged or in college when most of them are getting married as well. So what my friend said to me that day a few months ago put it all in perspective. I could never figure out before then why everyone just left me or outright ignored me.

Now that I look back on it it makes sense. Everyone that has left has either improved their lives so they can continue on an upward track in life. Or take a devastating spiral down and ruin their life. My first husband and second husband were are of a prime examples of the Spiral check. When I first met both of them they were the Charming sweethearts.

Of course, that is how all the stories start, isn't it?