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For my father

by The Clarkbar84 3 months ago in Family
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Thank you

For my father
Photo by Liane Metzler on Unsplash

Father,

I've wanted to do this challenge, but the words I wish to speak cannot come to my mind. I grew up admiring you, but you were never home, and mother would play the game, "Wait till your father gets home!". That would pin fear into my brother and me to the point that we wanted to cry.

You were never home because you worked two jobs to keep this family afloat; your favorite saying to me is, "The Cat's in the Cradle," referring to the song of the father never being home to watch his son grow. Well, it is valid to an extent, I have my own life now, and I live a few hours away. However, you have never come to visit or asked me to come down. But somehow, I've always wanted your praise; it's weird how it's something that I seem to strive towards. I guess children always want to please their parents. However, you've only told me that you were proud of me twice in my life, one when I joined the Basketball team in ninth grade and the other when I returned from Iraq.

But like I said, I’m always trying to get your praise; even now, in my late thirties, for some reason, I look towards you for some sort of, "That's an excellent job, son, or keep it up, you got this." Plus, no matter how I try not to be like you, I become you. You joined the Air Force; I went to the Army. You worked on electronics; I ended up working on electronics. The difference between you and me is that I'm always home.

I know that you tried; you tried your best to be a father, and we butted heads a lot, maybe we are too much alike, and that was the issue; I moved out when I was sixteen and lived on a couch till, I graduated High School. Life has been hard for me, and now I'm a father of my own with three kids.

I've always wanted your praise, but what I've never told you is that I'm oddly proud of you too. You did your best, worked extremely hard, and had a rough life, too, and I know that you wish you had done things differently; I appreciate that. But here is what you have taught me without knowing it. You taught me that family is essential and that I must work hard to care for them.

You taught me to take the time to be there for my family and that at the end of the road they will be there. That a job is a job, and it will go away. How did you teach me this, one may ask? Simply, I learned from the mistakes that were made; I learned to grow and create change; I wouldn't have been able to do it if you didn't show me what I shouldn't do. That may sound harsh, and in a way, it is, but I wouldn't want it any other way. Life is hard enough, and the lessons you taught me without teaching me are the ones that made me who I am today. That made me a hard worker, a kind man, and a caring father.

So, Dad though it seems like I've always asked for and wanted your praise, today I'm here to say that I don't need it anymore; I don't strive for it anymore. However, I am proud of the man I am today, and I want to thank you for making me that way; I'd like to say, since you probably didn't hear it, a lot growing up, I'm proud of you for trying your best!

Your Son

Family

About the author

The Clarkbar84

My mind has stories forming all the time; they tend to get wrapped up in life and never on paper. My works are scattered within real life.

Find me:

Kindle Stories: https://www.amazon.com/author/hunteralex

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