Darkness Takes Me

Darkness draw me in.

Takes me to a place I’ve never really been.

It shows me all that I can be if I just let go and let it in.

I can see it clearly more clearer than the light.

I’m sorry sometimes I succumb to it.

I can’t help but feel it and know it more than a sunny day.

Maybe the darkness is apart of me.

It’s apart of me more than you know cause what I try to be is someone else that makes everyone else around me happy.

Instead of being me.

I don’t think it’s good for me to let it win.

But, sometimes I’m blinded by the empty promises.

I have yet to see the lights promise.

I don’t even know what it looks like.

I’m sorry I find myself tortured by my own sadness.

I wish I could see the positivity in everything like you do.

When I step one foot in front of the other.

I don’t feel anything but numb.

But when I come back to the darkness I feel something.

I feel a deep sadness within me.

Maybe that’s who I am.

Sadness.

I’m sorry you can’t accept me.

I’m sorry darkness is my friend.

They say don’t let the darkness in.

But sometimes I can’t help it.

The light isn’t always my friend.

It comes and goes like the wind.

But darkness it’s always there when I need it.

I see it in my dreams.

I see it when I stop laughing at things that don’t make sense.

I see it in my mind.

My mind a wondrous place filled with darkness.

Why am I so close to it.

Tethering on its side.

I feel so deeply sad in the darkness.

In the light I hardly feel anything at all.

I’m sorry I’m a burden to you.

I’m sorry you have to worry about me.

But, sometimes I want to let it take me home.

I want the darkness to take me home.

Cause if it’s all I can see then it must be home for me.

Everyone around me is the opposite and I’m living a life of pretending to be happy.

So let it take me and maybe just maybe I’ll be free.

Or maybe I’ll lose all that I am.

All that I was suppose to be.

Oh, darkness why are you in me.

What if the darkness will make me feel free.

What if it will just shake my soul and I’ll become someone I wanted to be.

What if the darkness is necessary.

What if it’s not my enemy.

What if everything they say about the light is actually the real darkness.

What if everything they say about the darkness is the real light.

What if I’m a sinner, naturally.

What if my sins keep me company.

How can I not want to feel free.

What if sins are freedom.

What if it was all a lie the wanted us to believe about our sins.

What if all I am is for nothing if I don’t let the darkness consume me.

All I’ve ever tried to be is good.

What if being good is a mask that only keeps you from being you.

I don’t want to not be me.

I want to set myself free.

I’m not afraid of the dark.

I stay awake at night wondering who I could be.

Only the dark knows how much I’ve been wanting to be me.

Only the darkness knows about me.

What if darkness is my only friend.

How can I not let it take me.