SPIRITS INSIDE

A few days ago, I visited the Facebook page of some obscure magician or sorcerer. Sparse likes, hearts, and laughs were sprinkled amongst his fifty-nine posts, twelve of which had zero likes or reactions. Forty-six of the posts had obscene, grotesque, and insulting comments...

(Wait, the page just froze on me! It's like he or they know I'm there, spying on their Facebook page. I've been writing in the past tense, but, truth be told, I've been examining the contents of their business page in the present! I say 'they' because the Facebook page of Pandit Yad Adnan -- that's what he calls himself -- uses the pronoun "their" in the first six posts that established and set up one of Pandit Yad Adnan's business/advertising pages on the Internet.)

Sunday

More than a year ago, I was a customer of Yad Adnan's. He drew up my astrological chart and looked at my palm. He claimed that I have a good hand for business, and that anywhere I go, I would be assured food and shelter, but that I was being haunted and tormented by black magic in my mother's apartment, our bed, and my body. I thought it might be my aunt who was to blame for this alleged black magic, and he seemed to agree.

But when I made subsequent visits to Yad Adnan, he was joined by a different man who seemed more authoritative and spoke better English; and the story or narrative of what was ailing me quickly started to change...

Even after I've wasted so much money on many useless damaging things, the main emotion I feel is numbness, if that's even an emotion. Passivity. Apathy. Sin? Acedia.

My lower abdominal pain is plaguing me again this morning. Even though it was only after I recently interacted with their Facebook page that the familiar and banal symptoms of persistent headache and tummy pain made themselves known to me again, it might be better for me if I abstain from any and all alcohol or spirits today and tonight, even small amounts.

April 17, 2023 3:33am

I don't want to live like this anymore. I'm tired of the past. I'm sick of reality.

But I wasn't always like this. Was I?

April 21, 2023

I've been scammed again. Luckily this time it was only for about three hundred thirty dollars.

April 22, 2023 11am

It wasn't that long ago (around March 27th, after midnight) that I first started to really pay attention to--albeit superficially and credulously--the Robin Hood and Karl Marx on marijuana fairy tale of Illin Mask's Cuantăm AI (which isn't Illawn Masc's and isn't real and may never be). I read the short article (which was linked from a YouTube ad) with great fascination and interest.

I can't deny that my tummy also hurts this morning, but I think this time it's primarily because of what I consumed yesterday: orange juice, a chocolate almond croissant and a subpar strawberry cheesecake from a neighborhood café. Too bad it wasn't a strawberry cheesecake from the downtown Orange Triangle. That one was actually really good, even though the wine and beer made me angry later. Alcohol sometimes has an infuriating effect on me, and I must be more mindful as to how much I drink (I should limit myself to only one kind of drink) especially when I'm not at home.

Anyway, I apologize for the digression, but I'm tired of getting scammed. At least this time it was only for $300 and 1/10 as opposed to $3000. And I could've lost a lot more this time if it weren't for my mother. This wasn't the first time someone tried to remotely access my computer (or device), just this time, the scammer/con artist wasn't successful.

3:35am - 4:16am April 24, 2023

What if this is all bad karma for things I've done in the past, especially past lives. I've never stolen from, robbed or scammed anyone in my current lifetime. But in former lives I must have. I was a thief?

I must mention how obnoxious white people (mostly white men) who ask for money can be. Some of them look like homeless and/or drug-addicted beggars, but some of them are younger and don't look so bad. Some of them seem awkward, annoying, or even "aggressive," while some of them act like pretty smooth and perceptive con artists.

Frankly, I think other races are better at asking or begging for change (e.g. black men asking for a little money to buy a McDonald's burger or meal). But whites (I assume they were all white) tend to act a lot more entitled, transparent, and obnoxious when they ask you for spare change or money. I don't agree with the young angry mulatto kid I once saw sucker punch a young white "beggar" who asked him for money, but I can almost understand and empathize with his violent rage.

There are so many con artists, beggars, and scammers in this world and the Web. Some of them are white and/or lazy bums and drug addicts. Some of them are Vedic astrologers, psychics, sorcerers, magicians, and cryptocurrency scammers. What they all have in common is they feel entitled to thousands upon thousands of other people's dollars without actually providing anything of real value or worth. Capitalism was supposed to be about the exchange of value in a free society. Thieves and scammers transform enterprising free-market societies into chaotic states of lawless anarchy.