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Natural Beats Fake

Be Yourself

By ASHLEY SMITHPublished 7 years ago 3 min read

I would imagine that this piece will be quite unusual for this part of the site. I am male and what I intend to write about will probably be unusual. I have no idea if my personal views are rare among other men or among the female readers I might get. This piece has come about after discussions with my girlfriend, especially before a party at our house recently. I love her and the way she looks, but I don’t want her making loads of effort to look better, or at least better in her eyes. I don’t want her to do all the usual things you will see advertised to change how you look, the things that fill magazines and TV adverts.

She’s sitting to my left with her hair up, no make-up, glasses on, and an old vest top on, but looks great. She does wear varying degrees of make-up, depending on time and inclination. If going out or to somewhere special, she will wear more. She always looks great when she does, but our “discussion" started when she wanted to go further for the party. A few days before, she bought false nails and, the other day, false eye lashes. She showed me a picture of the nails and I gave my opinion. She got rid of them, thankfully, as they looked fake. Unless the nails blend with your own nails, they will never look real, unless that’s the aim. She decided to buy and wear the eyebrows. I said what I thought and left it there. She has beautiful eyes and beautiful eyelashes already, so in my opinion they looked horrible, dead spiders was my opinion.

We did disagree a lot over them, but decided to leave my opinion and let her decide. She thought she looked good, I didn’t, but it wasn’t worth long-term rows. I would suggest anyone who wants to look good for someone special should ask that person first. Extras don’t always make you look better or more attractive. Showing you have spent time and effort to get ready might appeal to some, but I’m sure I can’t be that unique that I always prefer minimum. Work with what you have, don’t try and alter it so you look like a new person.

One thing that always confuses me is the idea to shave off eyebrows and then replace them with thick makeup, sometimes resembling magic marker strokes. Another one that has always confused me is of a woman who dresses at home, after carefully buying things in a shopping trip, only to appear to change their mind in public. Many times, I have seen ladies getting off trains and buses in town and then starting to adjust their clothes while struggling to walk in their high heeled shoes. The clothes won’t cover any more flesh then they did at home, no matter which way they are pulled or stretched. Similarly, the high heels were surely just as hard to wear in the shop as when you go out, until alcohol is added of course.

I fully understand that you want to look good, but do you really feel better and think you look better? If you're happy and feel good then ignore me, but check if who you’re with wants you to suffer to look good. This isn’t written purely for or about my girlfriend, it’s also not written for any age or how you look. High heels and plastic attachments might look good on some in magazines, but I wonder what happens when the cameras aren’t there. Accentuate how you look, use natural makeup, and use the hair and flesh you were born with. So, have your hair done, spend a few minutes on makeup and put on your best clothes. For some men, I am sure that will be plenty. Then again, it could just be me. Do what you want for yourself and feel good for yourself.


About the Creator


England based carer, live with my wife, her parents and 4 cats. will write for all areas but especially mental health and disability. though as stuff for filthy seems popular will try there . any comments, suggestions or requests considered

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