I'm Only Angsty When It's 3AM.

Let’s set the scene- you’re a 90s baby turned 00s kid who is enthralled by the videos on MTV and just old enough to experience the magic of radio. And oh baby, baby, was it a magical time.

Music became the core of the connection between the kids of this decade. We all danced to pop songs we didn’t understand (I’m looking at you, Genie in a Bottle), and had posters on our walls. If you were lucky enough to have your favourite artist visit your hometown, there was no photographic evidence, only vivid memories of the experience. I think it’s safe for me to say that both new and old music thrived in a special way 15-20 years ago.

As we all aged and outlets like iTunes and LimeWire rose in popularity, an array of music became available at the click of a button. Not only could we experience the hits of past decades, but also venture into evolving genres like R&B and pop punk. We all began to branch off into different styles, finding the genre that would define our adolescence- all while still learning how to use those colourful Macs in the computer lab in school!

Experiencing adolescence during the technological boom was something I personally welcomed in with open arms. I traded in my Walkman for the iPod, MTV for YouTube, and used my 1-hour daily limit on the home computer to explore social networks like Myspace and AIM.

Yeah.. that’s me in all my 2000s glory.

Hitting double digits, for me, came with a new attitude. I became shut off, sceptical, and longed for a reason to be mad at the world. You’d often find me with my hands stuffed in my oversized black hoodie, earbuds in, hoping no one interrupted my daydreaming. It was around this time that I traded in my pop classics for 90s/00s alternative rock, and fell in love with bands like The Script and OneRepublic. My light-hearted library became filled with heart-wrenching breakup songs. I found a special comfort in their anguish, without having felt that pain myself yet. It wasn’t feel-good music, but rather songs that made you feel.

As a nearly 26-year-old, I’ve come to realise that these songs not only consumed my teenage years, but also aided me through them. They’re the single-tear-drop, rewind-that-line, stare-out-the-car-window tracks that were comforting to me through my most difficult times.

An article I recently came across, dives into the complexity of the adolescent mind. The good, the bad, and the moody. Learning to navigate through this world, going through puberty, the stress of both home and school life.. No wonder we were all such confused teens! In this article, it details the emotional rollercoaster that we all experience, noting key emotions teenagers struggle to comprehend.

I think anyone reading this can remember a time when they felt each of these emotions on any given day. I also think anyone reading this can note a time when a particular song or playlist got them through those days. When talking to your parents or hanging out with friends just didn’t cut it, what song did you turn to? Whose album did you just keep going back to? Are there any songs that, to this day, become your best friends in your time of need? I’ll tell you mine.

For the sake of appealing to that inner angsty teen inside all of us, let’s focus on those negative emotions we all tried to shake off.

Anger. Bitterness. Dissatisfaction. Sadness.

Anxiety. Fear. Shame. Guilt. Envy.

We know them all too well.

When you're feeling any of these emotions, sometimes all you need is the perfect song to relate them to. That being said, now it's time for the good stuff. Grab a cup of coffee and a warm blanket. Here is a list of 9 alt-rock songs to curse the world to. And 9 of my personal 3AM-what-does-the-world-mean moments to accompany them.

For When You're Feeling Anxious:

1. Over My Head (Cable Car)- The Fray.

‘I never knew that everything was falling through.

That everyone I knew was waiting on a cue,

to turn and run when all I needed was the truth.’

Oh, The Fray. Not only did they break our hearts with their self-titled debut album, but they just had to release How To Save a Life and shatter us all over again. When I heard Over My Head (Cable Car) for the first time, I’m not even sure I knew what a cable car was. That didn’t stop me from screaming it into my hairbrush though.

This song is perfect for those times when you feel like it’s you against the world. When nothing is going your way, no one understands, and you need a lyrically genius song to finally feel understood again. This song helped me through many sleepless nights, and said all of the things I didn't know how to put into words.

For When You're Feeling Bitter:

2. Don't Speak- No Doubt.

'Our memories, well, they can be inviting.

But some are altogether mighty frightening.'

No matter what generation you're from, who doesn't know this song? A breakup song that gives you all the bitter feelings of the person who wrote it. I remember performing this song in my bedroom, as if my heart had been broken (spoiler: it hadn't. I was about 10). Nonetheless, this song has those false narratives rushing back to you from note 1. A classic that delivers every time.

Fun fact: I remember seeing Gwen Stefani in concert once she had gone solo, and watching as she charged into the crowd and right down my aisle. I touched her shoulder as she rushed by me, and it was one of the coolest moments. Anyway, back to No Doubt.

They brought an edge to popular music, and continued to give us music to lash out to for years. I think I'll be 60 and jump around to one of their albums when I just want to hate the world for a little while.

For When You're Feeling Dissatisfied:

3. Boston- Augustana.

'She said "I think I'll go to Boston.

I think I'll start a new life.

I think I'll start it over,

where no one knows my name."'

Ah, yes. For those times when you just wanted to pack a bag, ditch your flip phone, and disappear. I used to have this recurring daydream that I would leave with only enough money for a bus ticket, head to L.A., and make it big. In the process, showing my hometown what they lost.

Needless to say, I never did that. I did move 5,000 miles away and to a new country, though. Yet I somehow still want to pack it all in and relocate some days. This song reminds me that those thoughts are perfectly normal. If you get a chance, listen to the the softer second version of it, I promise it won't disappoint.

For When You're Feeling Sad:

4. Everybody's Changing- Keane.

'You're aching, you're breaking,

and I can see the pain in your eyes.

Says "everybody's changing," and I don't know why.'

I know, I know. Why didn't I choose Somewhere Only We Know? As much as I cry to that song as well, it seemed like the obvious choice. If you put any Keane song on around me, I'm bound to have some form of breakthrough. But for some reason, Everybody's Changing breaks my heart more than any other.

I typically revisit this song when any major change is happening in my life. Whether it's getting a new job, moving, etc., it places that nostalgic/bittersweet feeling in the core of my stomach each time. Everybody may be changing, but this song never changes for me.

For When You're Feeling Fearful:

5. Runaway Train- Soul Asylum.

'So tired that I couldn't even sleep,

so many secrets I couldn't keep.

Promised myself I wouldn't weep,

one more promise I couldn't keep.'

I don't have enough fingers to count the amount of times I've stepped back, taken a look at my life, and just thought.. what?

When you're feeling like there's no hope and you've gone too far down a path to turn around, humans are mentally wired to do one of two things: try anyway, or run away from it all together. Fight or flight. If you're one of those people who fights, congratulations! You've won at life, and I mean that with no sarcasm intended.

I'm one of those people that runs. I fly. When an error occurs, I shut down the system instead of trying to reboot. This has affected many aspects of my life; friendships, relationships, work, higher education.. I just bail. It takes a lot to rewire your brain to do differently, and it's definitely a process. But us flyers have to stick together through that.

For When You're Feeling Shameful:

6. Secrets- OneRepublic.

'Til all my sleeves are stained red

from all the truth that I've said.

Come by it honestly, I swear.

Thought you saw me wink, no.

I've been on the brink.'

Did you know that aside from being the lead singer of OneRepublic, Ryan Tedder also writes songs for other artists? You'd be surprised. Halo by Beyonce? A Tedder song. Remember singing along to Bleeding Love by Leona Lewis? Also Tedder.

It's no surprise then that OneRepublic saw such great success in the 00s. Tedder's use of melody and lyrics create the perfect cocktail to give you all the feels you'll ever need.

For When You're Feeling Guilty:

7. The Middle- Jimmy Eat World.

'Live right now,

yeah, just be yourself.

It doesn't matter if it's good enough

For someone else.'

Sometimes when you feel like who you are isn't good enough, all you need is for someone to tell you it is- and more!

Growing up, I can remember feeling a tremendous amount of guilt, in a very different sense of the word. I didn't feel guilty because I had done something wrong, per se, rather I felt I was making decisions that others wouldn't be happy with. And that kind of guilt is heavy.

It's another one of those things that takes time to learn. It's possible to love and respect people without living for them.

For When You're Feeling Jealous:

8. Two Princes- Spin Doctors.

'Marry him or marry me.

I'm the one that loves you, baby, can't you see?

I ain't got no future or a family tree,

but I know what a prince and lover ought to be.'

Well, this is a change in atmosphere! I danced along to this song looooong before reading the lyrics. It's simple, really. A girl needs to make a decision; choose our humble protagonist or make the obvious choice. Once I finally realised what the lyrics were, I was fully team humility!

If you find yourself perpetually stuck in that "talking" phase, blast this song and go through the confusions of it while simultaneously having a little bit of fun.

For When You're Feeling Angry:

9. Gives You Hell- All-American Rejects.

'Now you'll never see,

what you've done to me.

You can take back your memories,

they're no good to me.'

If you're grew up in the 2000s, you'll remember this one!

I used to sing this to the posters on my wall, angry for the sake of being angry. I'm a big fan of a contrast between lyrics and melody, so this was another fun one for me. Jumping around and telling imaginary people to go to hell? Sign me up!

BONUS SONG:

10. Dreams- The Cranberries.

Because I think we all need a little bit of happy after all that talk of despair. Rest in peace, Dolores, you beautiful soul.

Whew. We've made it to the end! If you liked what you've seen/heard, you can save the Spotify playlist below:

I hope those of you who are new to this genre found something you like, and to those of you who are feeling as nostalgic as I am: I get you.

Happy listening!