How to Curb Internet Addictions

At the darkest time of the year I chose to take a break from wifi in my home.

Having this time and space allowed me the opportunity for reflection on an aspect of my life that I was feeling the need to assess. I was feeling the pull to examine how my relationship with technology and social media has evolved, or rather, has regressed.

It wasn’t too long ago in my life that I didn’t have internet access at home. For years I have lived off-grid and for the longest time I had a flip phone with no data plan. A couple of years into living in this little cabin in the woods, I decided I wanted/needed to have internet access at home. I acquired a magical internet stick that plugged into my computer delivering instant wifi access. It was a pricey option but one that would work with my setup. At the time, I didn’t have a personal computer so I would sometimes bring my business laptop home with me to use with my internet stick.

One day, about 2 years ago I dropped my little flip phone from my second story loft and it smashed on the floor below. I resisted running out and getting a new phone right away as I was enjoying the limited contact ability and at the same time I was getting more into my craft of writing and decided to buy myself a birthday gift. I ordered a little Macbook to enhance my writing experience. Now I had the internet stick and a computer at home with me at all times. When it came time to get a new phone I was shopping locally and had a couple of options to choose from at the small town drugstore. I could choose between a flip phone similar to the one I previously had or a fancier budget smart phone. Upon advice from the store clerk - I went for the budget smart phone.

So now I’ve got a personal computer with an internet stick and a smart phone with a data plan. As you can imagine, my internet use went up dramatically. A little bit at a time, I was using my devices more and more and relying on them for quick information and endless hours of entertainment.

When I told a friend I had gotten a smart phone, I remember her saying “say goodbye to your life”. At the time I thought her comment was a bit extreme as I’d never been one to get totally sucked into technology. But then I got an Instagram account and fell into the rabbit hole of never ending scrolls of photos.

Eventually I started waking up and the first thing I would do is have a little look at what had recently been posted…maybe write a morning poem and post it with a photo too. Over time, I kept upping my data plan so that I could scroll as much as I pleased and stream as many Netflix series as I wished. Before I knew it was real, I had an internet addiction on my hands, turning to one of my devices whenever I needed a quick fix. I felt like my devices kept me company…I felt connected to something, although I was never really sure what that connection was with.

I look around me and I see that we are all connected to something yet I am unsure if we are actually truly connected to ourselves or each other at all anymore.

Two months ago I set out on a six week international trip so I suspended my phone service. I was told I could suspend it for up to six months and be able to come back to the same plan when I returned. The customer service rep asked me if I wanted to set a date for it to be reconnected or if I wanted to wait to call them when I returned from my travels. I opted to wait and call them upon my return.

While I was away, although my overall internet usage was less than when I was at home, there was wifi access pretty much everywhere I went and I was really starting to feel some negative emotions associated with my own reliance and use of the internet. I knew I wanted to give myself some time to myself without internet access when I came home to my cabin and I knew that if I reconnected my phone, I would quickly be adding data to my plan…I knew I wouldn’t have the willpower not to. While I know the importance of personal will power in relation to overcoming addictions, I also know it can be very helpful for a lot of us to set our lives up in way where the temptations are limited.

The first night back in my cabin, I started to feel like I wanted to reconnect my phone (no surprise there as I was now fully aware of my addiction and the strength of it’s power to manipulate my mind), but as the universe would have it, my service provider was impossible to connect with. Apparently (and somewhat ironically) they were having a several day special data deal and their access lines were swamped because of it. When I tried to connect with them, there was an 1,100 person queue and both their phone lines and internet chat forums were experiencing major technical difficulties because of the sheer number of people trying to get the data deal while the offer lasted. I don’t like lineups so I gave up trying to connect and decided it was a message from above that I was meant to remain off the network.

And I am so glad things unfolded as they did. For the past week I have had zero home internet or phone access. I have been using the internet at my shop but my time at home has been without the distractions of the enormous magnitude of information and digital creations that the internet offers.

A few very positive things have happened in the last seven days.

• Every morning upon waking, I have spent quiet time laying in bed just thinking of life and contemplating what my day may entail. I haven’t been reaching for my phone to check my social media accounts.
• My general focus has increased giving my creative drive a bit of winter boost and I have completed two creative projects I had on the go.
• I’ve read three quarters of a book about what it means to simplify life - the timing of having this book arrive in my life was perfect! I spent quiet hours in the evening reading by candlelight while feeling how the book was directly impacting my life in real time.
• I rekindled the love affair I had started last winter with Garageband, playing with creating beats and combining them with my poetry.
• I’ve written endless poems and articles without being distracted by or drawn towards quick visionary tidbits of internet information.
• I’ve listened to music and created playlists that I will be able to keep enjoying over and over…like modern day mixed tapes.
• I sat in front of my fire and did nothing else, because finally, after a long hiatus, I finally felt truly connected to myself.

While I do love aspects of technology, the internet and social media, I have to admit, my addiction to it was having a negative effect on my life, and I was justifying it because most everyone else seems to be in the same boat - we all seem to be becoming more and more reliant on this outer source of information rather than relying on the deep well of wisdom that lives within our core. I knew what I really wanted was to feel like I was back in the drivers seat of my own life and this would mean getting a grip on my internet addiction. I want to be a positive example for everyone in my life so we can all help each other thrive.

I am grateful for this opportunity to re-look at how I would like to continue this relationship with the information super highway, so that I can feel in control and fulfilled with my affair in cyberspace and in all other aspects of my life as well.

I took the time to be in the dark (with very limited distractions) and now I have a better understanding of what kind of light I would like to cast out into the world. May we all give ourselves the opportunity to bask in the time of reflective darkness.