Worth It

I signed up on Vocal in June 2022. Since then, I have wondered what I wanted it to be for me. I have been going back and forth on it.

It is time-consuming, and there is already so much to do. How much time can I spend on writing for the sole purpose of a challenge? Is it worth it when I have so many unfinished projects waiting for me? More often than not, a poem or a story that has already been published, such as on Vocal, will not be allowed for submission to other contests or publications. With my writing time already so limited, where can I find more time to read other writers’ stories and poems?

My poems have been improving since I joined Vocal. Participating in challenges with structure requirements, such as haikus, forces you to think harder and deeper. Even if you did not win, even if you did not get it exactly right, you have improved. More than anything else, even more than being an artist or a writer, I am a learner. It matters.

From December 2013 until recently, submitting anything for publication on Vocal or social media and even turning in my papers at university was more challenging than I can describe in a few words. It was not only because of stress or fear of judgement; I was dealing with PDSD. Every trace I would leave online would leave me shaking for hours. Everything I would say or do would be held against me, even the most innocent words. It was the end of the world every single time. Now that it feels too much like the end of the world outside, I am better than ever with myself, and I want to write as many stories and poems as possible. I can write and publish anything without fear, with a smile. I do not have any more irrational fears connected to it. I am not afraid of other people’s judgements. I do not feel the need for anyone’s approval. I write because I enjoy it. This is what I always wanted to do. For me, before, it was only a hobby. I was writing solely for entertainment. Now, I also like to tell my stories, hoping to help not only me but others as well in the process.

Thus, writing, participating in challenges, and publishing on Vocal might have been worth it after all.

Now that this has been established, for 2024, I want to truly give it a try to make more of it.

I want to participate in more challenges. I genuinely enjoy them. They are an excellent opportunity to take risks and write outside one’s comfort zone.

I want to look at the poems and stories I have written and see which ones I want to revise and publish. In doing so, I would love to attract more readers and get their feedback.

I also want to find the time to read other writers on Vocal and write genuine, yet encouraging comments afterwards. I have not done it enough. Writing can be a lonely activity. It is nice to have readers, people who take the time to tell you they enjoy the time they spent reading what you wrote.