First poem on Vocal

My first poem, hmm is hard to be recalled

It can only be felt through so many years of mine when I was writing for myself in the light and in the dark

I remembered so many phases of it each in a different time and year age differed so does my life my mind and my approach

Perhaps I wasn't writing in the past that much about narcissists but sure I was calling things out when the storm was burning me out

I was also focused on love and on the visual form of my sensitivity of mine to have a place and get out on the light leaving the world behind and just being in my inner self for quite a while

without all that led me to develop a kind of different way of life

Sometimes I was separating these two but at the moment all became the One

which is better more healthier for now

It was always my circle of life a process to digest or to discover or to describe

However for now I am more in tune with the Vocal community so It is not such a lonely road anymore

and probably it all affects what I am still writing for myself and what I am writing here

Sometimes I still can feel being just in the space of mine

Sometimes I am completely going out with my mind but still, under the effect of the environment I am in I think that's what most affects my recent writing here

It is not about the personal love and the longing that I for so long were throwing in here and probably still will do at times but at the moment my writing is more about the universal love and issues of life sometimes ways to heal it all or express ( that's all ;) )

you can only experience by reading so

I also remember when I first wrote a love poem on Instagram called Euphoria and it was a springtime a year later I wrote Colors of Changes for Vocal also during springtime It was not that long when within some months I found Vocal but it was exactly a year after I started writing poetry again this time in a public eye

I thought writing on Instagram and sharing such inner world of mine, it's better to have it hidden somewhere and it was easy on Vocal to really hide and share as none of the people I had connections with virtually knew about it

Thanks to Color of Changes I also got tips which was nice to be paid for the work let's say !

There were no comments, only challenges at times so my first poem was for a challenge I even painted a painting for the cover of it but it was all intuitively and this intuitive way of mine still goes on in each poem or writing as if predicting the next which is somehow my natural way of being

Which is something not that easy to be understood and communicate with by many because you are born this way or trained and I am both, being highly aware You need to learn each day and most of my writings and poems are about it

but I also give some moments out of this intuitive path of mine in writing only at times as it is just natural so I can not stop it as it flows as it needs to by itself I am just the creature in a human body and beyond that to do the work for myself and the world teaching, learning, being aware and experiencing mostly first as otherwise You can not help another if You dont feel or dont experience what they are going through its the only way to later create practice that will help and you can do it on a distance its the only plus that I can say Covid got me through in a way that I was more than just pushed or forced to explore the capacity of healing and creating practices from what I experience is unhealthy the most in a social world and we more sensitive empathic souls need to clean from it on and on writing is one way for it too so this will never change

In the Color of changes I was giving outburst from my inner love and to all of the love virtually out there that arrived in the Covid time or even some years before it

I really like this way of approaching to writing and environment on Instagram and my love for the One that I couldn't decide is all in there packed into One Colors of changes it wasn't colourful experience but I carried lots of emotions in there that were living inside of me and I was still digesting and healing

Since that time everything has been shifting and changing at least where I am at and with my experience of life synchronized with another near or far

At the moment it's not about anything that I was in before besides truth justice honesty going beyond to save yourself in a completely different kind of social realm world

Things are shifting more than fast so it's still the continuation but in a completely different state of arrival from the one I walked even a month ago even a week ago or even yesterday

but still going on my intuitive path my way but synchronized with the challenges not only of life but in here and the kind of creating in the very moment of the now which I find much more healing and pleasurable to be in as memories are not always the good way of coming back in and digging in especially if You are healing each day! It is better to be present and write from the present of the now as it is Your order of life from all other chaoses out there!

Healed information is transformed but here You often encounter past unhealed traumas or new traumas even of my own and reading it all might be more than just overwhelming so I love to read people's experiences but in the phases of healing not when one is entirely not healing and treating writing as a therapy as alone it won't heal it can even trigger more anxiety, panic attack and so on.

As highly senstive being in such platform takes much more effort than for non sensitive people so as a result some of my writing might be reactions to such experiences and feelings of energy the real energy of another behind their words not even telling now about commenting and reading deeper while you can be just ignored by the person You actually care about

We are human being after all so no matter what kind of individual I meet in here I sense the real truth behind and I feel all other issue from such person and as highly sensitive its reactive but its also protection and a way of helping so as my awareness is higher and faster even if i do so many healings and cleaning to have empty mind its not possible on such platform to just close it and let go it's an entirely work for both of the humans connected through it

so I guess my writing and poetry of now is the fusion of it all even more aware than before but also more running away from life to have some rest at times and to the contrast of it being in the very now and real with it predicting the time

It also varies if I can be alone or I am entirely surrounded or linked to other souls or even animals as these minds are not just yours anymore and if You sense a lot It does tend to live in You and write from You too so it is shared in here but often not calm down or not cleaned so often its a way of throwing things out for the final cleaning phase or saying goodbye to some unwanted ones that simply don't serve us as a healthy protection

for the last couple of months, I haven't been active on social media at all only for healing resources and intuitive creations that are my map my guidance which poems and writing are mostly in my life

so I bet it does differ a lot at least to some degree being inspired by different people and things but I mostly write from the moment it can be anything

and it is mostly from the intensity of my healing practices or healing of another or just being in here and reading another and going through each pain each hidden sadness issue and often joy or laugh or comfort

but mostly struggle with life or humor and nature expressions are where I am in recent days not even that much diving back into my own practices of life which will lead me to something else and someone else each day to read experience and digest

We can be in and out in our minds and hearts and it all does give a different kind of pursuing of the art of writing! that comes naturally out of us but how deep it is and real this You can only experience by feeling and reading and not many people can experience things this deep way from one another which I guess is the main reason why so many of the incredible writing and poems are still hidden in here and we can only know about them by reading and searching diving in here!

It is a beautiful journey through writing and reading and feeling and healing and cleaning! and the being! That I call a Vocal being!

Thank You so Much for Your Reading, Tips & Likes much Love and Big Heart to Your side !