Author, Read Thyself
Never believe “the little white lies.”
Author, Read Thyself
D. A. Ratliff
I grew up in the South, where “little white lies” were uttered daily. The “My, you look lovely today—love that color on you.” Or “I swear, that’s the best shrimp and grits I ever ate.” Or my favorite, “It’s so good to see you.”
Not malicious lies, but ones intended to be polite even though the person telling them didn’t mean them. While these folks intended these comments to be kind, there is an increasing use of the “little white lie” in society.
As a writer of many years and an admin for a large writing group for nine years, I have read a fair share of stories by novice to experienced writers. While many are excellent, many are not. Yet, in our quest to be kind and not be truthful, we tell these writers little white lies. Those lies do nothing to improve a person’s writing skills.
Recently, a writing group member posted a piece, lamenting that few had read it and asked for an honest critique. I read the piece and formed my opinion on why readers ignored it. To be blunt, it was poorly written. The author presented it as poetry but constructed it like prose. Yes, poetry comes in many forms and structures, some quite abstract. However, this was not one of those.
I chose my words carefully, not utilizing little white lies to temper my thoughts, but was honest in my evaluation. I need not tell you the writer's reaction—angry and defensive.
I have had my share of ticked-off reactions to critiques of my work. One of my first critiques suggested I use an ‘and’ now and then. I was livid. Who was she to tell me to add an ‘and’ to my sentences? (She was a newspaper copy editor.) I didn’t need… oh wait, yes, I did. Calming down and researching, I realized my story was full of run-on sentences. At that moment, I considered the possibility that I might not know everything about writing. I decided to accept the critique without anger and consider the review valid. Have I been successful in not getting mad when I receive unkind comments? No, I have not, as I am human, but realizing I could be wrong caused me to delve into information that has made me a better writer. It has also made me aware that I have more to learn.
As we saw with Amazon, the advent of numerous platforms to share writing on, both fiction and non-fiction, has created a plethora of writers posting work. Don’t get me wrong, I am not suggesting anyone doesn’t have the right to post. They do. But much of this writing is, well… not good.
Yet, the “likes” given to a story can be numerous, but the comments are often not truthful to the level of quality. “Love this, it’s wonderful.” “You write so well.” “I can’t wait for more.” Do they sound like little white lies? In some instances, these are genuine comments, but for most, the reviewer thinks, “That was awful, but I am not going to tell the author. I’ll make them feel good and tell them it’s great.” Again, that does not help a writer become better skilled.
What is it that we, as writers, should do? A Biblical proverb, “Physician, heal thyself.” applies here. Dictionary.com defines this phrase as “A biblical proverb meaning that people should take care of their own defects and not just correct the faults of others.”
Take care of our own mistakes. As writers striving to become better skilled and to write words with more significant impact, we should constantly study our craft. How can I write a better opening? How can I bring depth to my character? How can I not sound like I have never written a word before?
It is easy to fall prey to compliments. We all love them. I recently posted a story with a continuing character that I felt was not one of the best in the series. I was satisfied with it but knew I had written better-crafted stories. I received a lot of compliments, and I appreciated them. However, I remarked to a writing friend that it was not the best story I had written about the character. That friend agreed. That agreement told me my friend was honest with me, and I could trust this person's critiques.
Find someone who will tell you the truth. Someone you trust who offers their opinions in your best interest. Most of all, be honest with yourself. You read the writings of others. Only the person who has a false sense of their ability will not recognize when someone is more accomplished than they are.
Authors, read your writing. Critique it. Recognize when your work is not good and rewrite it. Don’t just toss out words to be cute or funny or make someone cry. Learn the skills to impact the lives of your readers. We can be our own worst critics. Sometimes, we don’t accept that our writing is good and beat ourselves up. Don’t do that. Turn that frustration into learning how to improve. Don’t tell yourself a little white lie.
As the proverb says, heal thyself.
_____________________________
Resources:
Dictionary.com
hpps://www.gotquestions.org/physician-heal-thyself.html
About the Creator
D. A. Ratliff
A Southerner with saltwater in her veins, Deborah lives in the Florida sun and writes murder mysteries. She is published in several anthologies and her first novel, Crescent City Lies, is scheduled for release in 2024.
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Comments (24)
There are times and places for critique. There are also times and places for support and encouragement. A recent example of unsolicited critique is a video of a female golf pro being given advice by a random guy. Helpful advice on how to improve, given by someone who really knows their stuff is great! Random advice is not, particularly, as you say, anyone can publish on the internet, regardless of skill and knowledge.
Congratulations on top story. This was a lot of fun to read. 
One of the best tips I received in regards to my story was an honest one in why it didn’t work. I learned from that and my respect for the person who gave me that advice grew. Constructive criticism is what helps us. If someone chooses to only hear the good and ‘white lies’ that is to their detriment. This was an excellent and honest written piece. I believe you may have a new subscriber. And congratulations
Preaching to the choir here. I tried that and many writers just huffed and left me stranded. People don't like to be corrected. Also, I reserve the right to decline if I think that a suggestion is not suitable. I love to get and give advice. I so agree with your article. Not everything is well written. We have to pick our poison.
Your stat is challenging your story is so beautiful you write like this you will be a great writer I wish and yes one more thing please open my vocal id and a story come later
Congrats on Top Story!!
What you share is really important, and it leads to growth as a writer. If I were to receive constructive feedback or critique on my work through this platform, I'd be pretty excited to take it and make changes. However, there have been a couple of instances where I've left grammar/writing style/plot critiques and felt pretty uncomfortable doing so. It's a hard line, and I believe the Critique community was made for this purpose? But I haven't posted there just yet. Your advice here is solid, and I think it's a great reminder that for many of us contributing on Vocal, likes do not equal quality, but humility and challenging one's self as a writer leads to awesome development and progress. Thanks for sharing.
"Only the person who has a false sense of their own ability will not recognize when someone is more accomplished than they are." Writing, and reading other works from the lens of a writer, is one of the greatest ways to exercise humility. I find this piece monumental, especially on a platform with which I have fallen in love, but which also, I think, is not always a space that holds writers accountable for meticulously revising our pieces. One of my favorite teachers in my graduate program said that no one ever became a better writer by being showered with compliments. He pushed us to critique each other's work with all the candor and rigor that this industry demands. We all became better for it. Very well done.
This is fantastic advice. I just finished an essay exploring the notion of transparency in the writing sphere at large, and how validation in place of honesty is harmful. I might end up posting it later today, actually, but I felt like your piece here is very relevant and I appreciate you putting this out to the Vocal community. While I regret that many writers on the platform will not heed such helpful advice, I hope it gets us thinking about our own work so that we can put out as high quality writing as we can. Falling prey to praise isn't healthy; we all need to be humbled in our craft, as it's the only way to get better. It starts with ourselves, as you so aptly describe here.
I'm not sure how many would be open to honest critique on this platform, unless they entered something in the critique community. I've seen instances of people getting upset over unsolicited comments. I think I could handle receiving critiques, but wouldn't be comfortable giving them. Heck, I don't even like mentioning a simple spelling mistake, unless it's to someone I've developed a Vocal friendship with. As for my own work, I apparently have no idea what is good and what isn't. Honestly. I write something that I think may be TS worthy, but it doesn't get chosen. Then something just falls out of my head onto the screen and it does get chosen. I often find myself going "huh?"
I've said before, I love that everyone here is so positive and kind.. and I also hate it. I've learned that for honest critique I need to go elsewhere, and I've become OK with this platform being what it is. If it wasn't so nice, I don't think I'd have the balls to keep putting out work every day, to be honest. This place being as it is means I can use it to build a strong habit, and grow my creativity gland. Maybe blunt critique is better in smaller, carefully chosen groups anyway, than out in public. I'm a bugger for run ons. I have to remind myself "you're not getting taxed for full stops" 😁😀
Excellent work, thanks a lot for this story.
Yes, this is true. And I think it’s important to find people who will be honest and say when something sucks or it isn’t clear. I used to take it personally but I find criticism/ critique is the fastest way to improve. Also some people are truly talented at giving feedback and making you want to be better. I thought this was a great article (no white lies here!)
Thank you so much. When I read back on some of my earlier stories I can't believe how amateur they are. I have rewritten several of the early stories. I feel I have improved with time, however I know there is still a lot of room for growth. Each time I write a story I learn more. Though, I have never taken any formal writing classes I am constantly self educating myself. I do have one friend, a fellow Vocalite, who is honest with me - in private message and from him I have learned a lot. I see Vocal as a place for encouragement and not critique. I will always find a positive comment for whatever I read. However if someone asks for my honest opinion I will give it to my best ability. Thank you again for sharing this enlightening piece.
Back to say congratulations on your Top Story! 🎉💖🎊🎉💖🎊
Words of wisdom. I struggle often with the tension of wanting to encourage people and their works, but also being honest. Where do you think the line is? Is the comment section just a place of encouragement or is it the place where authors are asking for critique?
I love this. Everything that you have written here is valid. I've read a lot of dross on here but I would never consider offering a comment unless I thought the person wanted constructive criticism. If I find something I like, I engage and draw it out in my comment. And subscribe if I want to read more by them. But sometimes...it's hard. I don't want to make anyone feel bad. I feel like I'm my critic - some of my stories are good. Some are very good. Some, I'm less than happy with but all need to read well and have form. I read and reread before I launch. I'm doing a microfiction every day this year and it's challenging but I try to be precise and think of form and edit, edit, edit! This was such a great article, D.A. I don't think I'll change anything about my approach on here. Even if someone asked me to critique, I'd be very wary. How's your book going? When will it be released?
Amazing job! Keep up the outstanding work—congrats!
Even something as simple as a second set of eyes to proofread one's work will elevate the quality of someone's writing. On a platform such as this, I assume that most of the writing is being posted straight to Vocal without much proofing and editing, much less constructive criticism. At the same time, are the creators here seeking a critique of their work? Or are they sharing their creativity and expecting it to be taken at face value, regardless of technical quality? There is a Critique community here, but I've honestly never looked at it to see what (if anything) is happening there.
An interesting piece and made me hink alot about how I view critique/criticism, I am for he most pretty self critical and I think I am OK with others making not so positive comments but at the same time- I have to have some level of respect for them to listen properly x Thanks for sharing...I will definitely be pondering some more!
Interesting article Deborah and made me think. When I comment on a Vocal story, I tend to stick to positive comments because the nature of the forum is generally one of support rather than critique. If I can't find anything I like in a story I don't comment. Knowing that people may be over flattering with my our work means that we do, as you say, have to be our own critics. In my view there is no substitute for engaging a professional editor if you want a thorough critique of a work prior to publication. This would not be practical for the Vocal environment of course. Having worked in an editorial environment long time ago I am acutely aware of the value of working with good editors and I hate putting work out there that has not been through another pair of eyes. Thanks and well done for raising these issues.
If a person gives someone unsolicited feedback or critique, then I feel it's okay if the writer gets angry and defensive. However, if they asked for honest criticism and get angry when they get it, lol, that's ridiculous! I'm the type that doesn't give constructive criticism to anyone, although it's solicited. I just feel too much of a hypocrite if I do that because my work ain't perfect either. So yes, it's important to find someone who can tell you the truth and we too must be open enough to receive it.
Without going into the detail I just erased, lol, let me simply say that I agree with you. It's not always easy to hear. I still remember 8th grade English Comp where I was accustomed to receiving high marks. One paper came back with a "B" & the comment that I had used indefinite objects & had never identified who was doing what. I was hurt. But when I reread the story, it was absolutely true. I learned & I grew. On Vocal I tend to take the comments of praise with a grain of salt unless it shows real engagement with the piece. (Let's face it, even then I have difficulty trusting in their veracity.) What I find most helpful is reading the work of those I find exceptional & engaging with them & their examples to figure out how to improve my own.
Ohh man you put into prose my recent and similar thoughts better than I ever could. No one owes you anything just because you put something out there.