6 Things About Writing I Wish I Could Go Back In Time And Tell Myself

We all wish for a time machine for one reason or another. 

Sometimes it's to go back and play the numbers for a big lottery jackpot. To see a loved one more time, or to go and tell our past selves not to go on that date because we're going to get our hearts broken. 

Sure I'd love to go back and do all of these things, but I'd also like to go back and teach myself a few lessons about writing that I learned the hard way. 

So what would I tell myself? 

It's Going To Take Time 

When I first set off writing novels I thought writing a book beginning to end would take me maybe a month, maybe two at the most. 

How naive I was then. 

Writing a novel can take a month if you have nothing else to do, no job, no responsibilities, and no need to eat, shower, or interact with other living human beings, then yeah it can take a month. 

But realistically it's going to take maybe two or three just to get that first draft down, and let's not even begin to add up how long it's going to take to edit and proofread the whole thing. 

Trust Yourself 

If you think you have a good idea for a novel don't start talking yourself out of it before you've even had the chance to write the idea down. 

I had a conversation with my brother the other day when I was visiting him in Texas about a novel I had thought about writing, but ultimately had thought wasn't going to be good enough… my brother bopped me on the head and told me that the idea I had scraped - sounded like a much better book than any of the other ones I had ever talked to him about and he demanded I go back to it so that he could read it. 

I should have trusted myself when I first had the idea for the novel instead of talking myself out of it. 

Trust that what you come up with is an idea worth writing. 

There Comes A Time When You Can Give Up 

It can be hard to give up on a story that we've dedicated hours of our time to, but sometimes it's just a necessity. 

I wasted months working on a novel just to come to the conclusion that I didn't even have a story despite the thousands of words I had written. 

Sure I could have spent time to try and figure it out, drawn out a board with post-it notes and string to try and find where the story was, but in the end, I decided to just move it to a different folder and come back to it here and there. 

It doesn't mean I failed, it just opened up my time to work on other projects with a clear story.

Rejection Doesn't Mean Failure 

Rejection goes hand in hand with being a writer. 

My biggest rejection recently came in the form of my application for an MFA program being denied. (On Valentine's Day of all days) 

I thought about taking it as a sign that I shouldn't try, that I should throw away my books and papers and go back to the real world, but my partner (who consoled me, snotty tears and all) said that it was just a sign to try again next year or even a different program. They only accept 6 applicants out of the thousands they receive, it didn't mean that I wasn't any good, it just meant that someone else was a little better. 

It's Never Going To Be Perfect 

The first draft isn't going to be perfect and even your last draft isn't going to be perfect, why?

Because there is no such thing as perfect. 

You can polish your novel till it shines, but there will still be someone out there who can find flaws in it. 

And there's nothing wrong with that. 

Some people are going to love your story and others may think that it's not fit to line a hampster cage, but that's on them. 

My partner hates mushrooms, but this doesn't mean that mushrooms are bad. They're just not for him. 

You Don't Have To Do It Alone 

When I first started writing I kept it as much of a secret as I could. I thought it wasn't something I was supposed to talk about until I had my finished book in hand or on the shelf at my local store. 

I couldn't have been more wrong. 

Writers need a community not only to have those nearby who are going through the same things they are going through but becuase sometimes you need to ask for help. 

Whether it's a critique partner, a beta reader or just someone to bounce ideas off of, a writing community will make all the difference in the world to a writer. 

They are there for you when you want to quit when you don't understand why your story isn't working, or when you publish your book and you have your first sale. 

Your first sale is always either a family member or a fellow writer ready to stand beside you with their flags and confetti cannons waving proudly in the air. 

Don't try to do it alone. 

I hope you will learn from some of my mistakes.

With love, 

B.K xo xo

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