Tortillas, Gateway to Marriage

The Mexican state of Oaxaca deserves its own book dedicated solely to its food, mostly consisting of the different names you can give to variations of tortilla, queso, and salsa. Quesadillas. Empanadas. Tlayudas. Hurraches. Entomatadas. Enchiladas. Chilaquiles. And of course, the taco. I knew them as the cheesy one; the Mexican pasty; the Mexican pizza; the pile of tortillas one; the small open top ones; the tomatoe-y ones; the spicy ones; the soggy breakfast ones (a personal favourite); and the ones that are nothing like the TexMex tacos sold in the UK.

Then there are the eggs. Con salsa verde o roja. Estrellados o fritos. Rancheros; con verduras, omelette, or divorciados. (Yes, divorced eggs).

How do they make the black beans so delicious?! Avocado leaves, I discover! (And probably animal fat, but ignorance is bliss to a hungry vegetarian).

And the cheese: wet and crumbly, sprinkled over chilaquiles; or stringy and mozzerella-like, perfect for melting in quesadillas. To fill a quesadilla? There are all kinds of spiced stringy meat from (all parts of) all kinds of animal. Or perhaps some corn fungus? Other countries throw away their maize harvest when it gets infected with fungus, but here it is a delicacy. Like mushrooms, only tastier. Or how about courgette flowers? Giant caterpillars? Another delicacy; you can only find them in certain parts of Oaxaca at certain times of year. Or we could keep it simple, flavouring it with epazote leaves which are good for your health.

And I can’t do the mole justice, of which there are seven types (that I know of). Pronounced mo-lay, it is similar to a curry, involving many different ingredients and spices, including banana and ground biscuit to make the thicker ones, ranging in colour from yellow, red, and green, to a deep brown-black made with chocolate. Eating the latter with eggs took some getting used to for me...

Then there are the fruit juices: watermelon, papaya, tamarind, mango, lime, dragonfruit, passionfruit. To quench a deeper thirst, there’s Corona, Sol, Modelo, XX, Victoria, or perhaps something stronger…? Oaxaca’s specialty is mezcal, an artisanal tequila-like drink. Made from the giant maguey plant, it is put in the ground with hot stones to give a delicious smoky taste and then ground down by a sorry-looking mule dragging a great stone wheel across it. After it is fermented and filtered and delicious and you can enjoy it with some ground-up crickets or grasshoppers. Yum?

After months of sampling such Mexican delights, I decided to dive in and attempt to make tortillas with some friends. The corn is first nixtamalized – a traditional method of soaking in limewater, washing and then hulling the maize – and then ground into a flour. Adding water and salt, the flour is later kneaded into a sticky dough.

Pat. Pat. Pat. I’m trying to shape the tortillas with my hands as I’m shown, but I look like I’m smacking a dead fish about. My Mexican friends make it look so easy. Pat. Spin. Pat. Spin.

Pati and Maya giggle at my attempts to mould the masa into a seamless disc. More chuckling. At least I’m entertaining. I finish my first and after it has been heated on the plancha they add it to the pile of tortillas already made, waiting patiently wrapped in cloth to stay hot. They stealthily put mine at the bottom so the men don’t have to eat it.

I try again. And again. After about twenty minutes, they’re not half bad. I proudly add a thick, round, hot tortilla to the top of the pile and Pati tells me that now I can make tortillas, I can get married. She winks conspiratorially then slaps me on the back and laughs heartily.

We join the men at the table and tuck into a plate of rich black beans and fresh, crumbly, wet cheese, scooped up with warm tortillas. David picks up a tortilla and holds it up to his face, scrunched in disapproval.

-What happened to this one? -

The women laugh and tell him pointedly that it was my first attempt. He scans the table for other options and, finding no alternative, grunts and tears off a bite. I guess an imperfect tortilla is better than no tortilla at all.