How Coronavirus Shaped My Perspective as a Traveler

2020 was going to be my year. After a rough (and wonderful--there were some amazing highs and lows) 2019, I was going to get my suitcase out from the closet and get back to traveling again. I had spent way too much time focusing on someone else’s vision rather than my own, and I was looking to clear my heart and my mind by traveling to some new and familiar places. First, I was going to head to Iceland and then the United Arab Emirates, and I couldn’t wait to do some traveling.

I had been working an office job and was hating it, as well as realizing that it was not meant for me. I missed having my own life and schedule, and the money I was making doing that was not enough to justify the connections I was making or the toll it was taking on my mental health. On paper, the job seemed perfect. In reality, it was a nightmare.

After quitting, this was a chance for a clean slate. You might have seen me posting a lot more (and a lot better content) on here over the past few months since I’ve had a chance to work on my own business and develop my passions. One of those was getting back on the road again and exploring the way I wanted to.

And then...you know what’s coming. We canceled our Iceland and UAE trip and hunkered inside, realizing that it would probably be months before we could travel again. I was devastated by the fact that I probably wouldn’t be able to escape from the life I had been living over the past few months. I wouldn’t have a chance to say, “f*ck you” to the life I had been enveloped in and hated. I also lamented the fact that I was planning on diving all into building this blog into a business and it happened to be based around, you guessed it, travel.

But something weird happened while I was upset. That feeling didn’t go away immediately--for the first two or three weeks of social isolation, I was pretty angry that things were not going the way I had planned. How was I supposed to get my mental health back if I didn’t have travel as a way to do it? Now I was stuck inside with my thoughts, frustrated, angry, and without a gym to work all of the anger out.

After time, I began having to sift through my thoughts and emotions and what it was about the act of traveling itself that I loved so much. Was it the chance to distract myself from some of the realities I was facing with my life? Was it because I loved getting a chance to take a step back from reality for a while? Or was that only partially the reason why traveling had become such an essential part of who I was?

All of travel is escapism, but once I had a chance to look through some of my old pictures from former adventures and to think about all the places I’ve gone over the years, I realized it was much more than that. It was the chance to find a completely new part of who you are through meeting new people, learning new things, and connecting with other cultures. It was learning that you love the sounds of throat singers from Tuva, or that you have the balls to bungee jump when you’re afraid of many, many other menial actions.

It’s realizing that you are capable of so much more than you ever could have imagined. Of being able to learn a new language, climb the Himalayas, or look chic in that dress from Paris. You get to try on all different parts of yourself--you have a chance to know who you are from almost every angle.

Being at home and grounded for a while has greatly changed my perspective on why traveling is so important to me. It has also made me more conscious of the fact that I am insanely privileged. I’ve had the privilege of traveling to six continents and over 50 countries, and I’ve had the privilege of finding out something new about myself in every single place.

While I’ve been home in New York, I didn’t want to lose that same sense of discovery that I would have if I was exploring new places. I’ve delved into online course trying to learn more on how I can make this blog the best it can be, and how I can spend more time doing what I love. I’ve been meditating every day. I’ve been looking into creating a daily life that is enriched by travel and visiting new places--not used as a way to escape and regroup.

This virus has been very hard on the travel industry, and there’s no way to know what it will look like exactly when this is all said and done. My life might look very different as a traveler than it did before. But my life as Alex will be strong and stable because I have put in the effort into making every day an adventure. As ready as I am to travel again, I’m also ready to come home again.

This post was originally published on alexonthemap.com.