What You Shouldn't Say to Single 40-Year-Old Women

We have this uncanny prejudice over older adults. We see them as an oracle for predicting the future.

We are annoyingly curious about their lives, knowing what works and how to use the information against them.

Age stereotypes about older people are pervasive in our culture. If you are not familiar with the term ageism — it’s the negative attitudes, stereotypes, and behaviors directed toward older adults based solely on their perceived age.

Young people often use stereotypes related to old age to infer the intentions, goals, desires, and abilities of older adults and guide their behavior accordingly.

Ads target the notion that people may feel a different age than their actual years. Some 60-year-olds feel frail and elderly, while some 80-year-olds feel energetic and young.

While aging can cause cognitive changes, older people can improve in certain areas of intelligence and worsen in others.

Is aging depressing for women?

Women are mostly at the receiving end of ageism. That’s why the beauty industry pushes skin revitalization pills and creams to women more than men.

Contrary to the myth that old age is depressing, many studies find that older people are among the happiest age groups.

We can see from Robert Roy Britt comprehensive article that shows what happiness looks like for older people.

Some say forty is the decade everything comes together. You finally stop giving fucks and do what you what.

This is true. My forty-year-old friends are fearless and feisty, but they get offended by comments like “you do not look your age.”

It’s annoying!

It seems so silly to talk about it as something negative when it is a privilege to keep getting old.

While you may consider someone over 40 to be an old person, that doesn’t mean they necessarily look at their age that way.

As you grow older, you learn to know your strength and fears. You learn how to filter bad energy from the good.

You make better social decisions because we have more experience, and this is where wisdom comes in.

What you shouldn’t say to women over 40

Everyone has ideas about how aging affects a person in various aspects of his life, be it in terms of deteriorating physical health or calm, serenity, and experience.

The way we treat older adults is influenced by many social factors, including our personal assumptions, expectations, and fears about aging.

Discrimination against older people is offensive. If you say some of these things to your 40-year-old friend or colleague, don’t be surprised if they never talk to you again.

“You shouldn’t wear revealing dresses out”

First of, it’s not your business. She doesn’t need your opinion on what she should wear.

I’m not 40, but I get pissed off when I hear people comment on styles I should wear.

I can imagine what it feels like for women over 40 who are told not to wear miniskirts, ripped jeans, bomber jackets, and sequins.

Telling someone they shouldn’t wear something is offensive because you are saying they won’t look good in such outfits.

It’s no one’s business what she put on her body.

“Don’t tell people your real age”

Most 40s women will be amused by this comment, while others will feel insecure.

Women do not, of course, typically embrace 40. We have been conditioned to believe that, for women, younger is better and 40 is expired milk.

It’s rude to tell a woman to conceal her age. It makes us feel unworthy and outdated instead of grateful for another year and proud of what we did on the way there.

“Will you ever get married?”

Me: Ahhh…Yeah, when you get shot out of this planet.

Seriously, we need to know the difference between curious and nosy.

That you are friends or acquaintances with someone doesn’t give you the right to intrude into their private life.

Again is don’t your business whether she marries or not. People are too nosy and ask this question because they want to brag about their awesome (fake life).

We should learn to respect privacy and boundaries.

“Have you had some work done?”

So does that mean that every person over 40 who looks great has worked on themselves?

Of course not. And even among those who have, it’s still a private matter.

If you feel they are prying, you can respond with, “I was about to ask you the same thing!” or “Are you asking because you are thinking of getting one?”

If you’ve had a botox, don’t hide it. Let them know you are offended. Don’t back away. Make sure you put them in their place.

“Do you still have sex?”

I don’t know how people feel when they ask stupid questions. Does sex have an age limit?

Well, it may surprise you to know women have a thrill in their sex life at 80. Yes, we do enjoy sex at any age if the man knows how to work us up.

Women not having sex at some point is by choice, not biology. Only a few are as a result of health problems. Gorrite?

“Is it not too late to have kids?”

Really? Its never too late for kids. You do know there is something called adoption, right?

She can even go for surrogacy if she doesn’t want to carry her own child.

Besides, at 40 a woman can still get pregnant and have kids. The stereotype that women can’t have kids at 40 is a myth.

But whatever her reason is, you don’t deserve to know it. Keep your nose off her private life.

This post was also published here