Once upon a time....

I had just heard the phrase yesterday, "If you stab her in the back with a ten inch blade but only pull it out five inches, you can't really call that progress".

Yes, life for women has gotten better. Yes, life for people of color has gotten better. Yes, life for those in LGBTQ+ has gotten better.

BUT

You can't pull your blade out halfway and expect us to be happy because you tried. Try harder.

White women have it the easiest out of any discriminated group. We are white, we don't worry about cops pulling us over (maybe for other reasons but not skin color based ones), we don't worry about being followed in high end clothing stores or any store, or living in a high end neighborhood, if people will call the cops on us for having a picnic, or not being believed at a hospital when you know you're sick, being told i'm in the wrong bathroom and assaulted because I don't look like a 'women' or 'man' by your standards, beaten or shot for who I am... I could keep going.

So when we have those rarer moments, where you're sitting there with a white male whose now just realizing the obstacles you face for simply being a women, it can get pretty annoying.

Priviledge. The word all white men have become frightened of. It has become the new boogie man. Amazing how fragile you have to be to think everything about a group, is about you. When a male comic or President Voldemort classicly goes after women in whatever new fashion (now it's the feminists), I don't shrivel and think " Wow, how dare they, that's not me at all!". No, I don't, because I know who I am and what I've done in life. If you get upset hearing it then maybe you need to reevaluate yourself.

For example, I made a point one time about how guys touch your back or put their hands on your shoulder and how I never gave them permission to do so, they're not my bestfriend or family member, don't touch me. And this one guy got so offended, and I had to calm him down. Imagine that. Calm HIM down, (if you're in a minority you know exactly what im talking about). You make a true statement about your life experiences with some form/level of injustice and then proceed to have to explain why it's an injustice or calm down a person who doesn't 'understand'. It's not our job to teach you to not touch someone or to not say racist things, grab a book on white fragility, black lives matter, me too movement, LGBTQ+ information. Learn how they live and maybe we won't need to coddle you anymore. And if you rolled your eyes because of any of the groups mentioned, you are part of the problem. In any group there will always be extremists but if you look at the basis of any of these groups, also including feminists, you'll see we just want basic rights. Let me be clear though, I do not speak for all these groups but I do support them so these are my beliefs and opinions, from personal experience and knowing many people within all of these groups.

Black Lives Matter, Too. You completely miss the point if you say All Lives Matter. Duh all lives matter but black lives need extra attention and help right now.

Feminists want equal rights for everyone. Men, we don't hate you. And no, we do not want total world domination (thats historically a men's thing). We want a fair shake at a job because we are qualified, not to have our breasts stared at while having a work conversation and to be paid equal to our male counterparts.

LGBTQ+ are who they are. They are human just like everyone else and deserve to be safe, marry who they love and use the freaking bathroom ( you are worried about cis men dressing up as transgender and assaulting women, not actual transgender people....your ignorance is showing).

Me Too is finally letting women (and men) have a safe space to come out with their stories and tell others they're not alone. Sorry your favorite comic finally had his comeuppance.

Specifically about women, you as a male get offended maybe because: You are concerned about something you did with a woman in the past, you are now afraid to do anything with women, or you have many personal insecurities. Whichever it is, this is a problem YOU need to fix yourself. You ever heard the phrase "They're more afraid of you than you are of them", usually referring to spiders or snakes...but thats how many women feel about men. No woman or person in a minority group is going to want to sit there while you realize how many black americans are killed by police every year. They know. That's been their life since childhood.

Yes, there are a lot of poor white (cisgender) people. No one is saying that your life isn't difficult or that you've had an easy shake. But your skin color, sex, sexual orientation, isn't one of the things holding you back in society.

We cannot do it alone. Just because you don't experience or see the racism and discrimination happening doesn't mean it isn't there. There are close to 8 billion people in this world, a lot can happen.

Dont be never afraid to call someone out, especially close friends, when they say something derogatory or discriminatory or rude about a certain person based on their skin color, sexual orientation, gender performance, sex, weight, religion...etc. Why would you want to be friends with someone who calls another human derogatory words? If you're afraid that doing this will make you less popular or cool, well then you're hanging around the wrong crowd because what's cool is standing up for those who need help.

It's okay to not know, whats not okay is doing nothing about it. Youtube is a wonderful tool to hear different perspectives, there are many books on these topics, and just opening your eyes and ears a little more can get you to realize a lot more is happening around you than previously thought.

Stop covering for your jackass friends. Understand consent. Understand how to use your priviledge for good. Step in. Be a voice. If someone is standing alone against a room of people judging them for whatver it is, stand up for them. If this was a socially encouraged part of highschool, we would have a lot more people who step up instead of standing by.