The African National Congress Women's League has called for few recommendations on how sexual offenders should be dealt with. The recommendations include: life imprisonment without parole, no bail, and chemical castration.
So I'm writing this post for people who don't know what it's like being a survivor of sexual misconduct, but maybe knows someone who was a survivor. Sexual misconduct is an umbrella term for any act like rape and sexual assault. I will not pretend to know how everyone else handles sexual misconduct, I can only speak for myself and the stories I've heard.
We have all heard the saying 'prostitution is the oldest form of work', and whilst this statement is very true, society has always looked down on the men and women who engage in this particular line of work. And many still believe the misconception that the job is done out of desperation or because they were forced into it.
Today, I'm a woman who is embracing being a channel of Divine love and compassion. The power moving through me is born out of every moment I allow myself to love deeply and be loved. My life is unfolding into a romance beyond my wildest dreams. I'm celebrating a new chapter of creating impactful businesses with my dream partner. I'm honored to hold transformative containers for the women in my community. I'm connecting with the genius within me and attracting the collaborative genius of others. I'm passionately pursuing my purpose while being turned on by life's simple pleasures. Trust me, it wasn't always this way.
How many times have you been to a party or a small get-together where the topic of sex has come up? Seemingly innocent questions like “when did you lose your virginity” or “how old were you when you had sex for the first time?” can (and often do) land really hard for a sexual assault survivors.
Your favorite feminist “founders” are trash.
Tiny houses are having a massive impact as an ever-increasing number of people re-assess their lifestyles to better line up with their values.
Time and time again, I get on Social Media and find black women living their best lives. I see afros and twist-outs galore, beautiful light and dark melanin skin glowing, and positive images of black women being brought to light. I’ve seen pictures of college graduates, doctors with kinks and coils, and teens bringing justice to victims on buses, trains, and planes. Unfortunately, it seems like all the media ever sees is our hairstyles, our music, and our dance moves.
Rape culture is a toxic set of beliefs that are commonly held about the way the world is. It is a culture that normalizes sexual violence and just sees rape as inevitable, unavoidable, and a totally normal thing. Rape culture supports and encourages male sexual aggression as well as violence against women and other groups. It ignores the problems around sexual assault. Victims are blamed for the act and encouraged to take precautions to avoid being raped. This is a more dominant attitude than teaching people not to rape others.
Sexual assault can take many forms. The legal definition will change a bit from place to place, but it is generally defined as any action that is sexual in nature and violates the sexual integrity of the victim. It is an unwanted and non-consenting action performed by one person on another. In many cases, sexual assault is defined by its lack of freely given consent. It is used as more of an umbrella term that includes a wide variety of unwanted actions.
A man entered the car from a restaurant where he had lunch with a sales client. He smiled and did a double take from the door. He commented about my appearance first off, which under normal circumstances isn't inappropriate, but still makes me uncomfortable. He asked me if I was married or had a partner, where I was from etcetera. I answered in kind and asked similar questions to which his responses were; Texas Gulf area, he is married, has children. So for propriety's sake, we'll allow that the boundaries based on his and my answers were set. Platonic, family-oriented conversation, staying away from prying inquiries that veer toward sexual innuendo. He broke these boundaries immediately. He commented that my top was inside-out. He said what kind of a partner would let me leave the house without informing me of this mistake. From my interpretation, this was said with flirtatious intention, and sexual tone. From there forward, it never quite left the conversation for the duration of the ride. He began to ask me what I did for fun. I answered with my hobbies. Shortly there after he asks again. I answered again and I asked him what it was he meant or what he was looking for specifically. He said sex, drugs, and rock'n roll. "Can't help you there, pal." I told him where people go to drink and get silly downtown. He said "Where do you go for fun?"... I had answered this question in very similarly phrased terms for this man twice already. I respond, "Nowhere, really." I stop responding. And more than a few times, he interjects with, "Huh?"
The #MeToo Movement has sparked a lot of debate and conversation across the globe. It has challenged a lot of common conceptions about the current standards around consent, gender bias, and power imbalances. We are exploring deeper into personal autonomy and how that relates to other people. The movement is giving a voice to many victims/survivors that never felt they had a voice before and highlighting some of the injustices people have endured. The movement is bringing a lot of things to light, many of which have never really been discussed before.