If You Talk to Me About Sexual Abuse One More Time I Swear I'm Gonna Hug You

This story was supposed to be about the recent wave of #MeToo incidents in my country, Greece. But as I waited for it to grow, it became more than that.

It's a story about you, people that got abused and didn't come to the light yet. And it's about people that are getting abused right now but have a beacon of hope to guide them.

It's a story about me, being sick about what I hear and read. And it's a story for you, that feels the same way as well. We are people that can offer a digital hug, and listen to you. I can't put myself in your position. Sorry if you feel that's unfair. But I'm here to offer words of comfort and a self-esteem boost. Remember, the past can't change. You can make your future better though. Focus on the present.

I was about to write something else in the beginning, but my father reminded me that there's a huge problem with society. He can't understand why everyone comes out now, after so many years of covering the abuse they got.

So, I created a simple analogy for him. In a way that he would understand, I told him:

"Let's assume that you are a slave. You keep your head down for 30 years. You are old now, it doesn't matter for you. But someone is a beacon of hope. Someone breaks the chain of society and abuse and comes out, trying to make others come out as well.

Now…you are old. You think it doesn't matter if you regain your freedom. In your mind, you wasted your life.

Wrong.

You are a part of the wheel. And if you and others like you break that wheel, you are gonna help your children and other's children. It's your legacy."

My father doesn't understand that there are people that want others like them to come out of the shadows. He thinks it's a "trending" thing. An ultimate attempt for attention.

But if that makes even one person break the chain of abuse, we won. The people that shared even one word for it, helped. I hope I do help as well.

Reflecting now, wiser and more sentient, I can see that I wasn't in the healthiest family as well. Abuse comes in words too, and my mother wasn't perfect. And that's the sneakiest abuse can get. Sorry mother, I still can't love you. But I thank you because I have so much to say about it now.

I'm living in Greece. A country that is at least 20 years behind every cultural evolution. Full of injustice, it makes me sick. And although I see some signs of hope for newer generations, there are previous generations in high places that are spreading the virus of abuse shamelessly.

In January 2021, Greek Olympic athlete Sofia Bekatorou raised her voice. After 23 years, she revealed that one person abused her sexually. The thing is, this person wasn't any random one. He was the president of the Greek Sailing Federation. A big head, with a small brain, apparently.

Even after 23 years, in which a crime is deleted (at least in Greece), she raised her voice. She was afraid of losing her Olympic career back then. It makes me sick that this thought is true. Talking about sexual abuse in a narrow-minded Greece in the 90s was career suicide. She would be characterized as a liar. Who would believe that a man in that place would do such a thing?

"I wonder if fears ever really go away, or if they just lose their power over us."

― Veronica Roth, Allegiant

To lose their power, we gotta remove it from them.

One Voice Can Make a Difference

If anyone is discouraged to raise their voice, now it's the time to rethink that. Our society gets more aware of the situation. Trust me, even Greece knows about the situation finally *sighs in discomfort*…

"I want to stress that my personal experience and this individual case are not my only concerns," Bekatorou wrote in a recent Facebook post. "This is about the abuse of power in general and the current administration of the federation in particular."

"To those still left in the dark, we encourage you to speak out," she added.

After Sofia revealed the truth, many other athletes came upfront to share their stories as well.

And to add to that, some actors and actresses revealed abuse stories. Most stories were years ago, and they won't go to trial, but they give hope to newer people to find power and face their demons.

One voice will give power to a thousand people, and a thousand people will give power to a million more.

Make Your Past a Lesson for the Future

She didn't forget. Judging from countless stories I've read in the past, no one can forget. She waited for the right moment. The moment where her voice would mean more.

And here we are, in 2021, in a Greece that struggles to be more progressive - but frankly, we are catching up.

It only took us 3 years to catch up to the #MeToo movement…

People that know nothing about the truth need to learn more about it. And people that hide the truth need to be comfortable with sharing it.

It's Time to Remove Power from Toxic Men

How does it happen that in every damn head position, you'll find a white old miserable s#%t?

It's time for their era to come to an end.

Sofia managed to get him fired from being a president after being charged with sexual harassment. 

One big head down, million left to go.

Another actor got removed from a local TV series in Greece, after disgusting allegations about his abuse.

#MeToo movement is here to stay and remind us that there is toxicity everywhere, waiting for us to make a move.

Remember, silence means consent.

The time is now. The time when taking a risk doesn't mean career suicide. The time when help is available, more than ever.

Back then, the fear of getting crucified for saying that your boss abused you, was big. But now, there's empathy. There are more and more people that can relate to you. It's sad, but you are not alone.

Final Thoughts

I'm in no place to judge what you've been through if you've been abused. Remember, I've only been verbally abused by my mom. 

But I'm an emotional person. I feel empathy for everyone that's feeling negative. I can write about people who are abused because I can feel the disgust and rage of the injustice they lived. I can understand you more than you think. And this story is not only for you. It's for people that watch as well. It's a call to war. A war with no guns. A war with words as our shields.

If this story can give hope to one person, I won. I won the battle against toxicity. 

If you can write about toxicity and help one person as well, you are a part of the team. You won as well.

#YouToo can brighten the day of a shattered soul.

---Silence is Raging---