Even if Sexism Feels Good, It Does More Harm Than Good

Sexism is such a significant issue that even Europe’s leading human rights organization, the Council of Europe had to come together to give a universal definition for the term. The organization has officially recognized that sexism is “widespread and prevalent in all sectors and all societies.”

They have defined sexism as “any act, gesture, visual representation, spoken or written words, practice, or behavior based upon the idea that a person or a group of persons is inferior because of their sex, which occurs in the public or private sphere, whether online or offline.”

Adding on to this, social psychologists Peter Glick and Susan Fiske have further come up with two sub-categories of sexism.

The first form of sexism is called hostile sexism which refers to holding negative behavior and attitude towards a particular sex. For example, a woman might be denied a job opportunity just because of her sex and seen to be incompetent for the role.

According to research, a high level of hostile sexism was found to be associated with a negative evaluation of female candidates and lesser chances of being recommended for higher positions.

This is not limited to the workplace, but also extends to romantic relationships where men high on hostile sexism expect women to be submissive and conforming to the gender norms in the relationship.

Hostile sexism towards women exists because men see women’s presence in their traditional work areas like offices and sports as threatening to their status. They want women to stick to their traditional roles and values. Any deviation is seen unfavorably.

So, to deal with the threat they react negatively, sometimes even with physical violence against women.

A study conducted on Zimbabwean students found out that a significant correlation was found out between hostile sexism and rape proclivity suggesting that sexists are more likely to show such behavior in situations where it is more acceptable.

Coming to the second form of sexism, benevolent sexism is defined as “an idealization of traditional gender roles that dictate women as ‘naturally’ more kind, emotional, and compassionate.”

In such a belief set, while males are perceived to be the sex that is naturally logical, brave, and tougher, it asserts that women are kind, nurturing, caring, emotional, and compromising. Here women are celebrated for their femininity and nurturance by male appreciation and protection.

In Dr. Glick’s own words, “Benevolent sexism is this view that women are wonderful, pure, fragile flowers in need of men’s protection and provision and being cherished and adored. I would kiss the ground she walks on, cause it’s my word, my word she’ll obey.”

Let me give you an example. In a workplace, a woman might not be given a job opportunity because she is considered “too beautiful and fragile” for the harsh job. Here, she is forcefully being put into the mold of a traditional woman who is soft and weak.

Benevolent Sexism Is Equally Harmful as Hostile Sexism

Glick and Fiske noted the following in their seminal paper.

We do not consider benevolent sexism a good thing, for despite the positive feelings it may indicate for the perceiver, its underpinnings lie in traditional stereotyping and masculine dominance (e.g., the man as the provider and woman as his dependent), and its consequences are often damaging.

Benevolent sexism is not necessarily experienced as benevolent by the recipient. For example, a man’s comment to a female coworker on how ‘cute’ she looks, however well-intentioned, may undermine her feelings of being taken seriously as a professional

They observed that an interplay of the two forms of sexism, that are hostile and benevolent sexism actually leads to women being willing to put into the role of subordination. It impacts and shapes women’s perception of patriarchy and their position within the structure.

Benevolent sexism, although appears to very harmless is not so.

Women’s endorsement of benevolent sexism usually leads to a more hostile form of sexism. Not resisting and promoting this form of sexism might put women at more risk of violence. According to a 6 months-long study, promotion of benevolent sexism by women actually leads to a decrease in resistance towards and endorsement of hostile sexism towards their own gender.

This softer form of sexism allows casual remarks pertaining to women being fragile, beautiful, and caring. The role of child-rearing is entirely put on women due to their nurturing behavior. Birthing and taking care of children is seen to be the duty of a woman because she is compassionate.

Anyone not fitting in these stereotypes is seen not seen as a ‘woman’.

In a study, rape victims who cheated on their partners were seen to be more at fault than the rape victims who didn’t, suggesting that benevolent sexism leads to people reacting negatively when social norms of how a woman is supposed to conduct herself are violated.

One thing that needs to be clarified is that the sexist views towards women are not only held by men but also by women. While women reject hostile sexism, they are more likely to (sometimes more than men) accept and engage in benevolent sexism as it provides them with affection and care.

In a study, 105 women were told about men’s attitude towards women. When faced with negative and hostile attitudes, benevolent sexist attitudes were the strongest as compared to when the attitudes were not hostile or neutral.

This explains that women invoke benevolent sexism as a defense against male threats by reinforcing traditional gender relations.

This way, they are able to convince themselves that society is actually acceptable towards them and hence reduce the emotional distress of being oppressed.

Final Thoughts

There is no denying that almost all of us have been subjected to benevolent sexism, and even have taken a part in reinforcing it.

As long as we continue to ignore this form of sexism, the struggle against gender inequality will rage on.

Therefore, there is a need for increasing awareness so to help women recognize and deal with this form of sexism.

While benevolent sexism appears to be harmless, it actually harms women more by endorsing hostile sexism.

“I do not wish [women] to have power over men, but over themselves.” — Mary Wollstonecraft