A cry never heard

“yea it happened to me, more than once... yes I never called the police... yes I thought no one cared... yes I started to dislike myself... yes I felt ashamed and nasty... how could this happen to me! Why would this happen!” I couldn’t do anything but listen, how could this happen. What I am going to tell you is story of a young girl who believed she walked with God until it felt he was no longer there.

Lilliana was an amazing beautiful artistic child, quiet at times but none the less very outgoing. She didn’t have a lot of friends but she was a confident child so she never had any issues on her own. When Lilliana was 13 a tragedy struck her life and at 33 she is just now talking about it. She told me the story which I will try to tell you but it hurts so be aware.

Although Lilliana was quiet and didn’t have many friends she still had a lot of family. She had a cousin her parent disliked a lot but in a family full of boys, girls time was girls time, Lilliana convinced her parents to let her spend time with her cousin. She didn’t know why the parents disliked her , however Lilliana was a good girl, never drinking or smoking, played sports, loner for sure but a good girl. Well, her cousin was quite the opposite. Lilliana explained to me the night she stayed with her cousin and they snuck out to hang with a crush. I braved myself, Lilliana explained to me it had to be late at night and these two children (pre-teens) were gong to hang with boys. Lilliana was tired of being the good girl and wanted to have fun like all the other kids. Her cousin convinced her and they went. Lilliana has never had a drink before or smoked and as soon as they got to this house the rooms were very foggy from marijuana smoke. Lilliana had never been around stuff like this, but her crush was there so she went along. She explained to me how she smoked and took her first drink and that after she felt weightless. Her crush David has been very nice to her and they ended up walking to a bedroom. Lilliana explained to me she wasn’t afraid at this point because she had known her crush since 2nd grade, he just started to notice her. Lilliana explained to me that her crush laid her down on the bed and was being gentle and warm with her.

She said was scared but out of it from the mix of drugs and alcohol. She said, David wasn’t mean or anything he was only two years older than she. However there was another guy there older than all of them. David started to take Lilliana’s pants off and was gentle , she began to brace herself for what was going to happen then suddenly, her cousin and the other bust into the room as if they were about to have sex as well. Her cousin was more experienced sexually, however something happened in that room as David was going to be with Lilliana in that way the other guy pushed Liliannas cousin aside and also David And pulled Lillianas young body away from David. Lillianna was pretty curvy for her age so she was often mistaken for older.

No one did anything, the other man started to hurt Lilliana, she stopped moving the pain was unreal. When it was over the guys left and her cousin had to help her put her clothes on and to walk. The guys disappeared as the girls left the house. Lilliana was a virgin, never had drugs or alcohol and that night she lost her viginity and was raped, smoked marijuana and tasted alcohol.

The girls made it back home although they couldn’t go fast and they were at risk of being caught past curfew. As Lilliana got back to her cousins house she helped her in the shower and that’s where Lilianna thought she could take away what happened, but it never went away. One attempt to tell an adult had failed her when the adult just told Lilliana’s parent she was sexually active and not raped. This set off a wave of things that the young girl is still trying to recover from. I know it’s been 20 years from that occurence but I tell Lilliana it isn’t your fault and no one listened to the signs.

However she never said anything and he raped other women. Ladies it’s okay to speak when it happens, no more letting them get away.