You Can Have DeShaun Watson

Photo by Erik Drost

I don’t really know how the criminal justice system works, and Deshaun Watson getting a pass, we are left to bring sense to the disorder and render our own verdicts. Our starting point is Houston Prosecutor Johna Stallings, and despite his lawyerly, measured response, he’s just as in the dark as the rest of us.

"Today we presented nine criminal complaints for consideration by the grand jury. Beginning at 9 o'clock this morning, we presented evidence for over six hours for the grand jury to consider, as well as having witnesses available for those persons to testify in front of the grand jury," said Stallings, of the division chief of adult sex crimes and trafficking at the Harris County District attorney's office. "And the grand jury considered all of that evidence and returned nine no bills against Deshaun Watson involving these nine criminal complaints. We respect the grand jury's decision and ... conclude the criminal proceedings in Harris County.”

Does this simply tell us that one man and one woman in a room leaves no trace of the crime, and reasonable doubt is destined to reign. But doesn’t the testimony of nine women with the same story tie the loose ends. At least a pattern of behavior has been revealed that demands a court case. Or do all nine women lack credibility.

Watson’s commentary afterwards certainly calls into question his own. "I thank my lord and savior Jesus Christ for letting the truth be heard,” the QB invoked. Even if all the encounters were consensual, how does he begin to believe that Jesus would be hearing his case.

Either way, we don’t get a listen. Not to worry, we are assured that the failure to indict does not exonerate. Spectacular, all this law and diligent procedure that goes back centuries, and the logic cancels itself out.

So thank you criminal justice system, now we all have to get in line to register our own useless judgements. Here’s mine nonetheless. There are obviously evil men in the world. Men who would rape a women.

But I believe evil doesn’t discriminate by sex. Therefore, insidious women must also exist. So in keeping with the subject, the woman who falsely accused Duke Lacrosse players of rape comes to mind.

This type of person can't be alone and crimes always come with a motive. I speculate, among the possibilities, that the false accuser might feel jilted after a bad breakup, want to get back at a man who has wronged them in a relationship or money is involved in the her duplicity.

The latter in question here, Watson’s lawyers aren’t shy to call out the possibility. “Watson’s camp has suggested that the torrent of allegations stem from publicity and recruitment efforts by the plaintiffs’ lawyer, Tony Buzbee,” wrote Jenny Vrentas of Sports Illustrated.

Blood in the water creating a feeding frenzy, it’s possible, but let’s take a walk first. Go to work, cash a check, pick up groceries and navigate life on a daily basis, can you think of one person in your travels who would destroy a person’s life in this manner.

In fact, I think you’d have a hard time finding someone who would fake a back injury after a Deshaun Watson induced fender bender. So what are the odds that this creep happened to come across 23 women who are all evil enough to take part in a charade of this sort. I guess, Deshaun Watson really won the lottery.

As it turns out, the Browns hold the winning - or losing - ticket, and they should be ashamed of themselves. I wish there was a way to keep Watson out of my stadium. A far cry, women and the world will have to settle for a deviant who's probably going to have a hard time getting an appointment with a massage therapist. Pathetic.