My Uncle Wasted His Life Arguing About Politics, And So Will You…

The year was 1980, at my family’s annual July 4th backyard BBQ in Milwaukee, Uncle Greg’s face was steadily turning a bright shade of red.

Wisconsin is far away from the center of the nation’s political machine, but people are passionate with their opinions.

Being ten years old, I couldn’t follow most of what they were talking about.

But, it was clear as a 1980s jello salad that Uncle Greg believed Jimmy Carter was the answer to the nation’s problems, and someone else at the picnic did not.

While everyone was sipping cans of PBR beer, grandpa steadily emptied Whiskey Sour glasses ordered from an increasingly reluctant bartender, my father.

Uncle Greg explained in great detail how Jimmy Carter‘s economic plan was going to protect factory jobs in Wisconsin.

After he finished speaking, grandpa put down his Whiskey Sour and proclaimed loudly to everyone present:

“I don’t like Carter. I’m going to vote for Reagan!”

No one else said anything, but from their nods and eyes rolls, it was clear which side each person was on.

After all the arguing, the net effect of the Christenson family in the 1980s presidential election, was to cancel ourselves out at the ballot box

As soon as it was polite to leave without upsetting the host (my mother), Uncle Greg corralled his wife and children into a wood paneled station wagon and left in a huff.

About a half hour later, on his fifth Whiskey Sour, grandpa began to ramble about President Roosevelt as if he was the third candidate in the current election, and was asked if maybe he shouldn’t have a nap on the sofa.

The stakes of the election were as high, and the 1980 Reagan-Carter debates were as loud, as crude, and as shocking to the standards of civility of the time, as the political shenanigans of today.

“There you go again”

was Reagan’s catchphrase to shut down his opponent each time Carter made a good point.

The choice between pie in the sky economic plans and vapid optimism, combined with a manic fear about overseas enemies, wasn’t much different from today.

Reagan won, Uncle Greg argued with grandpa for 8 years, and then Reagan wound up doing a lot of stuff that upset Grandpa as well. Life in Milwaukee rolled on.

When Reagan’s term was over, one could look back and see the important stuff that did happen during his term: the birth of the personal computer, the fall of the Berlin Wall, MTV broadcasting “Video Killed the Radio Star”, had virtually nothing to do with who was President.

But that certainly doesn’t stop him from taking credit.

My father was never involved in the arguments about politics. He was a lifelong government bureaucrat. He knew elected politicians are outsiders within their own government, individuals who only show up for 5 minutes to shake hands, when there’s something to take credit for.

The Stagehand’s Lament

Once there was a theater lighting operator named Jack, who took great pride in his work. He loved the feeling of bringing the stage to life. Every night, he would sit high above the stage, operating the lights with precision and skill.

Jack started to notice the attention and praise that the actors received. He couldn’t help but feel a twinge of jealousy. He longed to be in the spotlight, to receive the applause and admiration of the audience. But deep down, he knew he didn’t have the talent or training to become an actor.

He couldn’t shake the feeling of inadequacy as he watched the actors take center stage. His work lost its joy, and he became distant and sullen. A once happy and satisfied man had become miserable.

The first time I heard that story, I was in a 12-step support group meeting. Someone was explaining that many of us unhappy souls are filled with a sense of grandiose self-importance.

Why am I not an important person?

can be a weighty anchor to our sense of daily happiness. Attempting to associate ourselves with “important” events can lead to a false sense of self-importance.

I was told to:

“Accept the things I can not change… have the courage to change the things I can.”

What’s a thing you can not change?

Unless you have the last vote in a perfectly 50/50 split election, one with 159 million people voting, and you live in one of the nation’s four swing states, you can not change the nation’s election result.

What you can change is your gracefulness in the way you handle a victory, or the defeat of, your chosen candidate.

Think about it, if you get angry and argue with your friends and coworkers, you might irritate a few people.

On the other hand, if you do nothing but handle it gracefully, you may influence the people around you, who then might take your side, who then might influence other people, and soon you might have a national movement that could change the world! 🥳

Vote, and let go.

Famous quotes on letting go.

“You can’t control everything. Sometimes you just need to relax and have faith that things will work out.” — Kody Keplinger

“The only thing you can control is your reaction to the events around you.” — John C. Maxwell

“Worrying does not take away tomorrow’s troubles; it takes away today’s peace.” — Randy Armstrong

“The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance.” — Alan Watts

“You can’t calm the storm, so stop trying. What you can do is calm yourself. The storm will pass.” — Timber Hawkeye

“Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it.” — Charles R. Swindoll

“The green reed which bends in the wind is stronger than the mighty oak which breaks in a storm.”~Confucius

“The key to being happy is knowing you have the power to choose what to accept and what to let go.” — Dodinsky

“The only real battle in life is between hanging on and letting go.” — Shannon L. Alder

“You can’t control the wind, but you can adjust your sails.” — Yiddish Proverb

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Author's note: another of my "reactions" to what's trending on Medium.com.

All uncredited photos from Unsplash.