I Don't Drink

Believe me. I know how this sounds. I want to preface this by saying that I am in no way trying to judge anyone's lifestyle nor am I trying to make myself seem superior for not drinking. It's just a boundary that I have that I want people to respect.

Born to religious parents, I was sheltered from all things secular. Parental controls for TV, only gospel music in the house, strict friend vetting, and church every Sunday morning and Wednesday night. Drinking was just one thing on a long list of “bad things”, but the contrarian in me wanted to rebel. Jesus turned water into wine once so I figured it couldn’t be that bad in moderation. Then I went to college where drinking in moderation was a rare practice. My anxiety kept me in my dorm on weekends, but I was quickly adopted by a persistent extrovert who wanted to take my alcohol virginity, so one night we went to a corner convenience store with her fake ID and she bought me a Smirnoff Ice and some orange-ish wine to start off. She said the Smirnoff tasted like Sprite and the wine would taste fruity, but my excitement quickly wore off when I sampled the drinks. They did not taste like Sprite or fruit to me. They tasted awful, like a good beverage that had been tainted by something poisonous. My esophagus wanted to reject it, but I forced it down. When she asked me what I thought, I was honest and told her I didn’t like it. She said that was normal for anyone's first time and that we’d try again.

That next year was more of the same except we didn’t need fake IDs. This time I tried three different pink wines whose names I don’t remember. They all tasted like Robitussin. Again, I was told that I just hadn’t found the right drink yet and that I needed to try again. So, in my spring semester I went to my first party hosted by the campus alternative radio station I’d joined the year prior. The party theme was boxed wine so I tried (and hated) some Franzia and whiskey. I kept trying to tell my friend I didn’t like it and no longer wanted to drink, but she threatened to abandon me if I didn’t finish all of it. I felt pressured so I complied. I didn’t want to ruin anyone’s night. I wanted to be fun.

I wish I could say that was the only time I let people pressure me into drinking. Once at a bar I was with someone who told me they wouldn’t take me home until I finished a drink. Another time some coworkers pushed me to take shots that I kept saying I didn’t want. I know you’re probably thinking that I should’ve just said no. I did. I said no so many times to so many people and I thought that living in a time when setting boundaries and saying “no” is becoming so normalized that it should work for drinking too. Again, I don’t judge anyone who drinks, I don’t think I’m healthier than anyone who drinks, and I would never tell anyone to stop drinking. These are just my experiences with people who try to force me to drink when I don't want to. It’s just not something I need and what I choose not to consume has nothing to do with anyone else. If someone told you they didn't like onions you wouldn't try to force them to eat an onion. It's not that big of a deal. I just don’t want to drink.