How Do You Order Marijuana?

I used to smoke, back in my college years.

But I don’t anymore. Here’s why:

I was introduced to it around my second year of college. A couple of friends I was close to invited me to their house and just started smoking.

They invited me to join their “rotation."

And me. Being me.

Iinstead of saying “I’ve never smoked before,” I said “Sure guys!” which probably showed them that I’d never smoked before, but nevertheless, we smoked.

And it was good, weed relaxes me in ways I couldn’t seem to do on my own.

Which is why I am pro-marijuana.

But now you may be thinking, “If you’re for it, why don’t you smoke anymore?”

Well, because I don’t know how to order it.

And before you laugh, I’m dead serious.

Let’s go back. After hitting it for the first time my brain was like, “Yeah, we can do this,” so I bought my first bowl, a lighter, a box to stash my stuff, but the only problem was... I didn’t have stuff to stash.

My solution was to get my friends that introduced me to it, to get mine when they got theirs. Luckily enough I worked with one of the girls, made things real simple.

In my head I did it real smooth, I’d prepared the speech, I was ready to walk away till she hit me with, “How much do you want?”

Y’all, there’s no guide to buying weed I had no idea, so I just said, “$40 worth,” and how I knew I messed up was when she then said, “Damn girl, but I’ll get it.”

That “damn girl” really messed me up. It followed me for a couple of days until she told me to meet at her house to pick it up.

I ordered enough weed to last me for months.

Let me just emphasize that I was not an everyday smoker. I smoked when I was stressed because working 2-3 jobs and going to school full time did not allow me to go to the gym with all the rest of my basic college friends to relieve stress. Smoking took a few minutes whereas the gym took too damn long.

So, AHM.

I ordered enough to last me, my friends, and anyone else who came over; a good bit after that I learned to just slide them a $20 and make it work.

But when I left those friends, I moved away to a different city, still pro-pot head, I didn’t know how to order weed.

There’s no drive-up window for me to order. “I’ll like a number three hold the seeds.”

No.

I have to casually find a drug dealer.

And how does one casually find a drug dealer?

Then I’d have to know how much to order, and the whole grams/dimes/quarter system just doesn’t make sense to me.

Then I have to meet up with them, and if they’re in a sketchy neighborhood, I’m turning around and going home.

I need a high-end drug dealer, preferably one with a menu.

Anyways, I don’t smoke anymore cause I don’t know how to order weed.

How do you learn to do that?