Well Conditioned

Some analogies hold every time

They are usually taken from sports.

They have meaning transcending reality

And apply to deals of all sorts!

Take our bodies; they need exercising

To allow them to exercise more.

And the more we exert them, the better:

They can train without being sore!

When you see such a marvellous body,

"Oh, it's so well conditioned!"

— You'll cry.

Something similar went for your hair:

When your scalp would smear it with oil

You'd go around — a halo of greasiness:

So disgusting you'd want to recoil!

Now, with products, you can dry it out

Wash away that yucky oily flare

Then you rinse and repeat, and repeat, and repeat...

So much care for your hair, shiny hair!

When you see such resplendent cool mane,

"Oh, it's so well conditioned!"

— You'll cry.

What'd you say about all of the heatwaves?

"Get AC!" We all suddenly freak.

Otherwise we'd just waste electricity,

And from nowhere the gases would leak!

It could slow global warming right down,

Then ACs would become something rare.

And while everyone else had enjoyed them,

You'd be stuck with your dumb earthy air!

When you breathe such immaculate ether,

"Oh, it's so well conditioned!"

— You'll cry.

Then there is an astounding good reason

For which things are the way they are

It explains why I am how I am

And you are just the way that you are.

Some things happen for such a good reason

And that reason is making us say,

"Do not question our soundest traditions

Things are meant to be just this way"

When you encounter such powerful logic,

"Oh, it's so well conditioned!"

— You'll cry.

Have you ever "just hoped" for the best?

It's annoying and rightfully mean!

'Cause there's no one to give you perfection:

Disappointment already foreseen!

It's much smarter to think of the worst

And avoid receiving insults.

To make sure that your prospects are met,

You only need to skew the results!

When you meet such a realist heart,

"Oh, it's so well conditioned!"

— You'll cry.

For our kids we have one demand,

that nobody exploits them in life.

So we need to give them tough love

And impart our lessons with strife!

When deserved, only give your affection:

Make them work for the better results.

Disregard that they're learning a pattern

And become people-pleasing adults!

When you take part in such thoughtful love,

"Oh, it's so well conditioned!"

— You'll cry.

And, of course, our own need protecting,

With a world that is scary place!

There are so many people unworthy.

Why call "people" such a disgrace?

We should better make sure to isolate them:

They don't look like you and me.

I mean, they are called others with reason

They just really don't look like me.

When you cross paths with such deep thinking,

"Oh, it's so well conditioned!"

— You'll cry.

Here's to the paradox of our nature

The solutions becoming a blight

Causing all of the wonderful problems

That we thought them out to fight.

It's ingrained in our very own beings.

Dare I say,

"Oh, it's so well conditioned you'll cry".