The very air around me takes a breath
and hushing holds it.
Soft seeds of salt slide down my cheeks.
It's dark.
So very dark.
I know there is sound in the world.
Somewhere
people hear words, music, laughter.
Thoughts find a voice.
Not here.
Syllables stick in my throat and cut my tongue.
Telling truth is torture.
Asking, sharing, explanation: all is exhausting.
The world shifts under my feet.
That which was stable reveals itself sand.
What was sweet seems suddenly sour.
There is no satisfaction in taste or touch.
It's coming.
I feel its rush and rumble
the rough and rapid tumult rising and roaring.
I cannot move although my silent self sends warnings
through my traitorous body.
My eyes closed; I brace for it.
The spray is first,
running on ahead to kiss my tight-closed lips.
The cold touches my toes and slides over my ankles.
I am consumed.
Cold, freezing, pummeling, overwhelming, ravenous.
There is no me.
Gone.
I am erased and now adrift under the charging tossing weight of it.
My mind remembers help.
My memories say: warmth, sun, the calm caress of confidence.
Fingers relax, unfurl, leading the hands then arms to drift upwards.
My heart opens ready for the touch of grace.
-Judey Kalchik, April 2020
(Image from @cargocollective.com )
About the Creator
Judey Kalchik
It's my time to find and use my voice.
Poetry, short stories, memories, and a lot of things I think and wish I'd known a long time ago.
You can also find me on Medium
And please follow me on Threads, too!
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