Used

Used

The first time I felt your body intimately against mine was powerful.

You held my body in your arms as if I was paper thin, fragile, warmth flowed through your skin into mine.

the first time anyone touched me nicely. the first time I felt safe in someone's arms.

I told you to take my body, because you already had my soul, and so you did. like fire in my veins, I had never felt so comfortable or alive.

You showed me what it was like to be touched with love and not possession. You showed me what it felt like to be begging for more, Your fingers, like magic, dragging across my skin and where I'd never let anyone before

You made my breath stop. I needed you because you had finally taken all of me.

The last time you touched me intimately, I can't even say it was intimate, you rolled your eyes and sighed saying "okay but hurry up, and don't panic this time."

You'd never been so angry about hearing how much I would beg for you, but this time it was a chore. Even though you teased me into begging, then acted like it was a burden. I no longer felt safe, although to say I felt disgusted was an understatement.

I begged you to take my body again, and to keep my soul safe in your arms, I didn't want it back. It was already yours after the first time.

You no longer held me like I was fragile, you just let go.

Your eyes were empty, and you didn't smile when I gave you everything.

Disgusted

I felt dirty, unwanted and I can't wash away the filth you left in my bones. I can only cut my skin so deep before I have nothing left but emotions I can't let go of.

bleeding out of my own flesh, I begged you to stay.

I craved the intimacy, even if it was fake because I just needed to be held by you again. I needed you to look at me with passion like I was the best you'd ever had. But instead you scoffed and looked away, telling me it was pathetic to beg.

When you're the one who asked me to call you master.

Get on my knees for you.

You taught me to beg, and you left me on the bed exposed, acting as if I was never what you wanted.

Because I was never what you wanted. Just what you used.