To Broken Friendships

If I'm being a burden...

Just fucking tell me.

If I'm causing some kinda problem...

Just let me know.

I can leave. I can be gone in a second.

Cause I'm not about that life.

I don't wanna be a burden or a problem.

I'm used to being temporary to people.

It's cool.

It hurts but I'm used to it.

I gave all I had to try to help,

But if my purpose is exhausted,

If I am now a problem,

I can go.

I fought the battle with you,

Fought it as if it was my own.

Fought it to the death with every last penny I had.

Fought it to the death with every last word I had to pray.

You WON it.

And I still fight for you, pray for you,

And soon you won't need me to help.

Soon you can easily win it alone.

I can FEEL the tension.

It's a real, thick and tangible thing.

It pierces through my heart like a sharp needle.

I hate that.

I HATE feeling that.

It's better than nothing, but worse than peace.

And I want peace.

I know if I leave Ima have nothing.

No one.

But that's the price I'm willing to pay to make sure everyone I love is okay.

Because the love will remain.

The memories will remain.

I will never look upon any of it in vain.

And the pain will be REAL.

I will hurt. I will cry.

But it's for the best as long as I'm not a problem anymore.

It's for the best as long as I'm not in the way anymore.

I hate swearing that this time it's permanent.

This friendship is eternal.

This will be forever.

And it never is.

If I lose it this time, I will give up.

Nothing here in this world is forever.

Please just tell me if you're done with me.

I want to rise above this.

I want you in my life.

But I can't do it by myself.

So if you're done,

If I really serve no purpose in your life,

Please just tell me.

I will go.

My heart will break.

My life will shatter again.

But I will rebuild and heal,

And I will be stronger

If you miss me enough to want me in your life too.