to be you

I smelted myself a thousand ways

trying, vying

to become you,

But the mold didn’t fit

It was more than just a bit….

excruciating,

So I return to my loving view

For I can’t become callous

Or cruel,

My nature is neither

It’s not cold, either

I tried my best to understand how

you exist, like this,

But

I

can’t

Nor can I stop loving anyone

Even you

Even after all you do

Even after you left me to burn

in fires hotter than the sun

Ones you turned on,

Does that make me broken

or god?

Or just a human fraud

Perhaps I’m not real

Maybe that’s the deal

Hardwired to love

To forgive

To live

Irrespective of how tired

of living amongst liars

of life crawling on my knees

over evil trip wires

Laid by those who demand

Sires,

I

am

You choose gutters

When everything

Worth anything

is higher

Existing only to collapse my pyre

from your jealous empire

When I would so gladly share

All that I was to gain

For I am working in our name,

But you don’t see

You don’t hear

You can’t feel

You can’t care

You just sit and stare

Into thin air

Waiting to steal energy

from those with light

Who might dare to show up

The truth of your story plight