I've been introverted for as long as I can remember. That in it of itself is not a bad thing. However, there is regular desire to isolate, be anti-social and step away; that's where the problem lies. And something deeper than I can tell, when I decide to be alone it's not for me time but more I just don't want to socialize. If I were to give this a place on the time-line of my writing it'd be the prequel to 'A Story To Tell Pt.1: With The Flip of A Coin'. 'A Story To Tell' is me deciding to, but still struggling to, step outside of 'These Walls'; what was initially put up to protect myself from harm (emotionally) was actually causing it. So at this point in my life I was faced with a choice, where my two options seemed to be the exact same thing.
These walls- I built to protect myself, but the only person attacking me is me
These walls- what they were and are now are different completely
These walls- structures that hide what's really going on inside of me
I don't quite understand, how I feel the need to hide certain sides of me
My friends that are with me- have similar nights, facing familiar fights with the very same enemy
I can see, that when the rain falls it's not hitting just me
Within these walls I'm lost in a web- What do I lie for?
Hiding the truth from people I swear I would die for
When I'm not okay, no one can know that I'm much more than tired
Trying to find the root of my pain is draining- is not enough to say I'm just tired
A voice resonates in these walls- I know it's not mine
Every choice is stained on these walls, they're corrupting my mind
In a room full of mirrors- surrounded by everything I hate in these walls
My personality, trapped in insecurity- how can I escape these walls?
Two thousand five hundred days and still fighting, there's a war in these walls
But I've been out of touch for a while, and with no missed calls?
I might as well stay in these walls
What's another night? When my eyes are adjusted to the lack of light in these walls
My head is under the water- emotions flood these walls
Can't fake a smile in a storm, the waters are rough in these walls
And beyond any reach- I'm sinking deeper, into the darkest corners
Without a way out- I guess I can't be saved from these walls
So can I tear them down? Because something needs to be done with these walls
Because I'm done with these walls, this war can't be won in these walls
But on the outside things aren't looking much better
So what do I do with these walls?
Will I stay or will I go? ...If I'm the only one in these walls
How do I decide, whether to stay or to go when there's no difference in weather?
Inside or out, built up or torn down, it's all the same with these walls
What they are and what they were are now different, but affect me the same
And if I'm to blame, then I reap what I sow in these walls
About the Creator
I began writing as a means of expressing creativity, relieving stress, and venting emotions. I mention my daily battle with mental health a lot, I hope it is relatable and inspiring to readers, as writing is something I'm passionate about.