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These Walls

I've been introverted for as long as I can remember. That in it of itself is not a bad thing. However, there is regular desire to isolate, be anti-social and step away; that's where the problem lies. And something deeper than I can tell, when I decide to be alone it's not for me time but more I just don't want to socialize. If I were to give this a place on the time-line of my writing it'd be the prequel to 'A Story To Tell Pt.1: With The Flip of A Coin'. 'A Story To Tell' is me deciding to, but still struggling to, step outside of 'These Walls'; what was initially put up to protect myself from harm (emotionally) was actually causing it. So at this point in my life I was faced with a choice, where my two options seemed to be the exact same thing.

By Josh MorganPublished 4 months ago 2 min read
These Walls
Photo by Denny Müller on Unsplash

These walls- I built to protect myself, but the only person attacking me is me

These walls- what they were and are now are different completely

These walls- structures that hide what's really going on inside of me

I don't quite understand, how I feel the need to hide certain sides of me

My friends that are with me- have similar nights, facing familiar fights with the very same enemy

I can see, that when the rain falls it's not hitting just me

Within these walls I'm lost in a web- What do I lie for?

Hiding the truth from people I swear I would die for

When I'm not okay, no one can know that I'm much more than tired

Trying to find the root of my pain is draining- is not enough to say I'm just tired

A voice resonates in these walls- I know it's not mine

Every choice is stained on these walls, they're corrupting my mind

In a room full of mirrors- surrounded by everything I hate in these walls

My personality, trapped in insecurity- how can I escape these walls?

Two thousand five hundred days and still fighting, there's a war in these walls

But I've been out of touch for a while, and with no missed calls?

I might as well stay in these walls

What's another night? When my eyes are adjusted to the lack of light in these walls

My head is under the water- emotions flood these walls

Can't fake a smile in a storm, the waters are rough in these walls

And beyond any reach- I'm sinking deeper, into the darkest corners

Without a way out- I guess I can't be saved from these walls

So can I tear them down? Because something needs to be done with these walls

Because I'm done with these walls, this war can't be won in these walls

But on the outside things aren't looking much better

So what do I do with these walls?

Will I stay or will I go? ...If I'm the only one in these walls

How do I decide, whether to stay or to go when there's no difference in weather?

Inside or out, built up or torn down, it's all the same with these walls

What they are and what they were are now different, but affect me the same

And if I'm to blame, then I reap what I sow in these walls

sad poetryperformance poetryinspirational

About the Creator

Josh Morgan

I began writing as a means of expressing creativity, relieving stress, and venting emotions. I mention my daily battle with mental health a lot, I hope it is relatable and inspiring to readers, as writing is something I'm passionate about.

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