The Veil

In and out... in and out... like trying to balance the focus of a kaleidoscope.

I remember him ducking, I remember Walmarts lights;

I remember the buzzing.... Who are you?

Where are my kids? CAN YOU HEAR ME?!

Who are you? Married? Me? Where are my kids?

WHERE ARE MY KIDS!?

Shhhh......Shhhhh.....It's okay, you were in an accident.

Ow, my tongue. My head. My eyes.

FUCK, my eyes, what happened?

Seizure, seizure, I should know that word. I know that word. THAT WORD.

Is this scary? What am I feeling? WHO ARE YOU.
I feel sick, why is he always here? WHO ARE YOU!?

I can't breathe. WHY DOES MY HEAD HURT SO FUCKING BAD!?

Stop giving me morphine, I fucking hate morphine, it's making me itchy!
Why is he here? Husband? WHO ARE YOU?
Why do I feel sick when he's here?

I want my mom. WHERE ARE MY KIDS!?

Shhhh...Sh....shhhh.......

WEEKS, ITS BEEN WEEKS?
He's back and I want to throw up.
Sign, how do I write? How do I sign? What's my name?

When did I leave the hospital? BABIES!
My babies are here, it's blue? OH MY GOD, MY BABIES ARE HERE.

Why do I feel so.... off?

Momma, we're with momma now. Garage?
Crib and pull out, couch, in the garage.

"So glad you're okay. Rest. It's okay. It takes time to heal."
I just wanted to respond to my friends.
"You're always on Facebook" ....I just picked up my phone.
"Let me respond and I'll get off" I feel sick, why am I nauseous?

OW, FUCK, MY LEG!
"I'm sorry! I was trying to punch the couch!"
Husband? Mine? I feel so sick.

Momma. I want my mom!
I was just trying to say thank you to my friends.
Look what he did, I don't understand!

"I'm sorry, I'm just so panicked with you only having 5 years left"
Now I'm defending him? Husband, right?
Oh, presents? Us against the world?
5 years, 5 years, 5 years....but, I can't leave my babies...