The salamander king of Spain

The salamander king of Spain

The salamander crawled along the wall,
And wouldn’t look away,
I said, what’s up, why stare at me,
Go outside and play.

He tilted up his little head,
And stared me in the eye,
He said, I’m watching everything,
So don’t you even try.

I said, I’m only on holiday,
I’ve come to sunny Spain,
I want some peace and sunshine here,
Not reptiles driving me insane.

He shuffled closer down the wall,
His little feet went tap,
He said, you better watch yourself,
You’re standing on my map.

I said, your map, what do you mean,
This villa isn’t yours,
He said, I own the walls round here,
The windows and the doors.

Then from behind a flowerpot,
He pulled a golden crown,
He balanced it upon his head,
And slowly wandered down.

He said, I am the king of Spain,
And you’ll do things my way,
I said, you’re just a salamander,
Now kindly go away.

He puffed his little belly out,
And gave a royal stare,
He said, I’ve got ten thousand troops,
They’re hiding everywhere.

I looked behind the curtains then,
And underneath my chair,
I checked inside my suitcase too,
There wasn’t one thing there.

I turned around and there they were,
All marching through the door,
A hundred little salamanders,
Were running on the floor.

I grabbed my shoes and climbed the bed,
And shouted, this is mad,
The king looked up and smiled at me,
And somehow looked quite glad.

So if you go on holiday,
And meet the king of Spain,
Don’t argue with his little crown,
Or he’ll bring his troops again.