The Moment of Dread

The sounds begin to invade the mind,

And the stirrings of reawakened slumber,

The eyes commence a slight flickering,

As the daylight dawning calls your number.

😫

Slowly the eyes begin to open fully,

Then the sinking feeling moves from your chest down,

The heaviness rests within your stomach,

And the attempted smile is more a frown.

😫

The heart takes flight and begins to race,

The mind whirs and suddenly takes control,

Emotions fluctuate in all extremes,

Your fleeting happiness is what it stole.

😫

Your chest cavity becomes suffocating,

As you struggle to take a deep breath,

You ponder the extremes, the insanity,

Foregoing your dreams in a quick death.

😫

You soon dive into a lifetime of regret,

Even though it’s only minutes since you woke,

You struggle with the turn of the tide,

Hiding the pain of which you never spoke.

😫

You question if you’re deserving of another day,

Wallowing in the self destruction,

The sinking feeling getting bolder,

Stimulating your nervous system into overproduction.

😫

You long to return to your slumber,

Where your dreams still mount the chain,

There where there’s a chance of fruition,

And where you can escape the pain.

😫

Your struggle is real, one you combat every day,

It’s really a super strength, a super power,

As you still climb from your bed to face this life,

Although the crippling anxiety tries to devour.

😫

You are convinced you’re an impostor,

Not deserving of your very existence,

Fearful that you’ll soon be caught out,

And you fight with all your resistance.

😫

You often wonder if it’s worth the fight,

As you sink lower into the abyss of the stressed,

Worthy or deserving of the constant struggle,

In which your every day is dressed.

😫

Your mind sabotages all your efforts,

As it’s thoughts tumble instantly to your concerns,

Burying you in your crippling emotions,

Friend or foe, it certainly burns.

😫

The day brightens as your mood darkens,

Skipping the dawn of endless joyful possibilities,

Sinking you into a deep pit of despair,

And your day turns into persistent hostilities.

😫

You ride the hours until darkness again descends,

Thankful you made it through once more,

You climb into bed looking forward to escaping,

To enable the rebuilding of your resistance restore.

😫

Then when the sun begins to rise to end your slumber,

You experience your own personal Groundhog Day,

Your eyes blink and widen as you once more realise,

You’ve another battle to struggle through today!

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Originally published on Medium