The Midnight Bus

In my dream

A friend told me he’d traveled

On a midnight bus

The Queen was on it too

Prince Philip by her side

The bus, said my friend,

Was full of chickens

Now isn’t that absurd?

I wished my dreams were so benign

If that were my dream

The chickens would peck

The Queen’s eyes out – or worse

My chickens pecked my children’s

Guinea-pigs eyes out

True.

In my dreams the neighbour’s dog

Springs on mine and almost kills it

Twice

True.

In my dreams my neighbour

Drives his tractor straight at me

While I lead my daughter on her pony

True.

In my dreams the vet says

Take the horse out of the stable

When I ask why he tells me

He will die tonight

And you will need to saw him up

In this confined space

And I walk that long dark night with the dying horse

Until he falls away, away, away

True.

In my dreams my hydra-headed shame

For everything I’ve done wrong

Reaches out for me, strangles me

Suffocates, berates me, hates me

I want a bright red bus

Full of chickens and royalty I say to my friend

And as he begins to fade around the edges

He says, ah yes, but then you would have to be me

My lost children, my two dead daughters

Don’t wish to be another

You never know what lies beneath

The bright red midnight bus.