THE DAY MY HOUSE WENT MISSING

THE DAY MY HOUSE WENT MISSING

I woke up in my bedroom,
And something wasn’t right,
My house had disappeared,
Some time throughout the night.

My bed was in the garden,
My wardrobe near the gate,
The toilet sat beside me,
Which wasn’t looking great.

I found my little kitchen,
Halfway across the road,
The fridge was near the bus stop,
Beside a garden toad.

I asked a passing postman,
Have you seen my house today,
He scratched his head and told me,
I think it went that way.

I followed all the footprints,
They led me into town,
And there beside the bakery,
My house was sitting down.

I told it come back home now,
It simply shook its door,
Then turned its little chimney,
And shuffled off once more.

I finally caught it sleeping,
Behind the local pub,
I grabbed it by the drainpipe,
And gave the roof a rub.

It’s back where it belongs now,
But every single night,
I tie it to the lamppost,
Just in case it takes flight.