Supernova

I never reflected on being the last

because I never thought it possible.

When the Sun rose up to swallow the Earth

I imagined we would all go together.

***

Well...no...

I imagined I wouldn't be here to see it at all.

My life was supposed to flow

in the same way as all those before.

Pardoned from tragedy and unhappy circumstance,

I would move through time

both quickly and slowly,

aging in a manner so incontrovertibly evident

while, at once, uncannily peculiar.

***

Then, in my time,

when the arc of living had settled into rainbow dust,

or, perhaps, I'd reached the final step on the hallowed staircase,

I would drift away into the next life,

soul parting with body,

leaving a piece of me to return to soil

and my essence to find a place in the vast heavens,

where I could survey from a perch in the clouds,

those who came after me

and those after them,

each generation gripped in its own cycle of never-ending time.

***

But...now...

standing at the end,

I never imagined it could be like this.

You see, some heeded the warning signs and began to prepare.

Though, even before the alarm bells rang out

there wasn't much to be done.

What are you supposed to do,

when you are told the end of the world is here?

Do you laugh without mirth?

Do you sell all possessions and run for cover?

Do you release yourself before the horsemen do it for you?

***

I watched as humanity did it all.

Hunkered down in terror, clinging to their children.

Wandering in hopelessness, wondering how to help,

when no help mattered anymore.

Euphoric in their freedom from worldly judgement,

crossing items off bucket lists.

Greed and compassion,

mania and calm,

all existed together in warring oneness.

And, while I knew these forces prevailed long before the end,

I could see them now, plainly

as with x-ray vision.

Pretence dropped.

Honesty remained.

***

Then, after repeated exchanges of affection,

the deaths began.

One by one.

I don't know why.

Maybe we were meant to endure this moment alone.

There was no pain,

but there was resistance.

I cannot fathom the benefit of staying here amidst the supernova,

but, I suppose,

we cling tightest to that which we are about to lose.

I witnessed the weeping, begging pleading,

and unceremonious exits of those who did not wish to go.

The I looked on the stoic,

the amenable embracers of reality as each accepted their fate.

The time was now.

***

I held fast as they left this place,

teeth clamped down on my own nervousness

to encounter the invisible beyond.

I watched their souls part, knowing,

in this moment,

it could be me.

It would be me.

***

Then it wasn't.

***

I looked up from the pebble on the ground

when I realized the wailing has ceased.

The cloud in my vision cleared long enough for me to notice

I was the only one left.

I lifted my head and looked out at the emptiness, hoping

to see a single soul standing on the horizon.

There was no one.

***

I rose to my shaky feet and wandered for a moment

in the weary wilderness

for, with no civilians to speak of,

civilization it was no longer.

The eerie quiet filled my ears

like whale-song in the open ocean

washing over all that remained in nothing.

The sidewalk laid out a path to nowhere.

The city lights illuminated the way for no one.

The only entity that still belonged were the trees;

the branches waved to me with their ancient fingers.

They too, wondered where all the people had gone.

***

I knew the sound would be feeble

before it left my lips,

but I called to the air anyway.

"Hello?"

My weak voice was the only sound for miles,

reverberating off vacant buildings,

dissipating in the sky,

where I assumed the answers lay.

I looked up.

***

"What are you waiting for?"

Then the sun burned brighter,

flashed hotter,

and swallowed me whole.