So Happy I'm Me

"I'm just...happy. I've never felt that before I'm just exactly where I wanna be."

-Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004)

I'm just happy, so happy that I sought myself out

so I could explain all my worries and doubt.

I did see myself as an odd little stranger

who dared capture glances of those of my gender.

I feared for the way I could not blend in well

into masses of letter jackets and school pride hell.

I wanted to show my true colors galore,

for the pink of my flag is for me and for her.

The girl or trans girl who got away,

and no matter how hard I tried, she's engaged.

The bottom of my pride rings strong with blue

to show love for my men and trans men, too.

While the purple we fly does ring so high,

for it brings all together to scream that we're bi!

I wanted less fear, so I grew outspoken

and shared my heart with those who were closest.

The first, a parent, a parent who said,

"That's fine, but please, date boys instead."

The second, a guardian angel of sorts,

would say, "What is there to be upset for?"

"Does it matter?" she asked.

"No it doesn't. I love you."

She shook her head and said

"But that girl's got to go."

I've held onto pink for my comfort and strength,

while the blue promises protection at length.

The purple of us all lifts my spirit so far

that I cannot be harmed, they can't touch my heart.

Acceptance is scary and rejection is worse,

but living as me will always come first.

The colors that show the pride in my heart

are what carry me through all the shadows and dark.

Darkness expected when your love is unique,

but we cannot be silenced, so our colors still speak

of love.