sisyphus

once we walked together

dreaming of something

comforting for all of us

it was a breath of fresh air

i so broken, you so whole

never first, you are first

.

never the first priority

.

we took winding paths

during harrowing situations

you pulled i pushed

maybe it’s better the new way

once we hit a path

a boulder blocking any way around

.

my home is that way

you said almost distantly

as if it were an apology

.

we could push it

you broke it in half

hoping it would get us through

a modern day Sisyphus

.

we cannot push it now

.

you turned to me,

i have people waiting

i know the only way back

is through

.

you stayed to break up the rock

five more minutes

then you can figure it out from there

i reached for a hand once more

you flinched, it was not mine

.

priorities my friend, you understand

there’s essential love and then there’s love

you’re somewhere in between

.

i turned to throw the last piece aside

and then you were gone with the fog

.

alone again, never the first choice

the backup

everyone loves a friend in need

until the first choice is awake again

first choice

second choice

third choice

.

sometimes some words

that allow me to take up space

even for just a few days

.

this is not one of those days