Self Indulgent

There comes a time when you realize

That what you are doing is wrong

It can hit you like a truck

Or it can creep up slowly on you

Choking you awake in the night

Suddenly everything you thought was fine

Everything you thought made you content

Brings a bitter taste to your mouth

Your chest feels tight

Your breaths are short and forced

Your world folds in on itself

And you realize it has all been a lie

It is hard to lie to yourself

But we all do it

More often than we would care to admit

We tell ourselves we are happy

We tell ourselves we are good

And inside we are screaming

When you grow up that idealistic part of you

Gets caged away by responsibility

And if you do not visit them

You can often forget what truly

Makes you happy in life

What you really want to do

It is easy to lie to yourself

But it is hard to keep it up

The façade crumbles

The cracks show

And your caged self screams for justice

The real battle is whether

You indulge it or not