Searching for You

My heart aches, seeing you name places I don't want to see it.

I want to see your name in a way that makes my stomach ache in excitement.

Not sadness, not resentment, and definitely not the jealousy that you are making me feel.

I don't want to be a bad person and that is who you are slowly making me become.

Because I liked of you a lot and, I secretly hoped that maybe we could have taken a stroll down memory lane one day.

But you would rather chase after women who shouldn't have you,

as I am chasing after a guy unable to accept my gratitude.

From you, you made me a jealous person, you made me resentful.

But at least now I know my worth.

Now I know not to chase after someone.

To no longer let these thoughts be consumed by someone who isn't completely deserving of them.

10:53pm, my thoughts always tangle because of you.